Love Scenes 101: Don't Be Corny or Porn-y

Love

Photo by Boris SV

I'm the final stretch of another round of edits, so today I'm bringing you an (updated) post I did about a year ago on love scenes. Hope you enjoy!

 

So what exactly constitutes a love scene? Are they only important for those of us writing romance? Of course not. 

 

A love scene can involve any number of things. It could be that kiss that your readers have been rooting for since page three or it can be full out swinging from the chandeliers romp (I'll talk more about how to choose the level of heat on Friday). But regardless of the type you're writing, it can make or break a story. Nothing will make me put a book down faster than a cheesy or non-emotionally engaging love scene. 

 

So let's look at what can cause a lackluster scene and then what you can do to make it sparkle so that your readers remember that moment long after putting down the book. 

 

What can turn a hot moment cold?

 

 

You're squeamish

If you, the author, are not comfortable with the scene, your readers will be able to tell. Do not write an erotic romance if the thought of typing out four-letter words in a sex scene makes you cringe.

 

Shallow POV

The reader needs to feel like she is in the moment with the characters. So make sure you use Deep POV effectively and don't pull out of that.

 

Lack of character development

If your characters are flat, their love scene will be as well. We need to be invested in the characters.

 

You haven't established sufficient motivation for the scene.

Don't have them kiss/jump in bed/etc. just because it feels like a good time. Make sure we know why they are doing this now. That doesn't mean that things can't happen fast. Many romances have a love scene very early, but you have to establish the WHY and get us connected to the characters before that moment happens.

 

You haven't raised the stakes enough.

The risk of them getting together is nil and therefore uninteresting. What consequences could happen now that they are giving in to their love/desire for each other?

 

No change happens.

Love scenes should change the people involved--be that good or bad.

 

The scene lacks emotion.

All we have is description of the physical acts and not what's going on in their heads and hearts. This can turn a great sensual scene into gratuitous (and boring) porn. *yawn*

 

 

So what are some ways to make sure your love scene gets readers' hearts racing?

 

 

Make sure you've sufficiently built up tension.

This is beyond VITAL. Without tension build up, a love scene won't mean anything. See this post.

 

Write in emotions.

Tell us what's running through your character's mind. Often the emotions in this type of scene will be mixed, but let the reader know what's going on. THIS is the whole point of the love scene--how it affects the characters.

 

Love scenes should be tailor-made

You should not be able to cut and paste a love scene and drop into a different story. Only these two characters could have this exact scene.

 

Conflict should still be present.

If both love each other, have no obstacles, and jump in bed--snore. They have to be risking something. Otherwise, it's just two people doing it.

 

Use dialogue.

I love using dialogue in a love scene. Teasing words can be great for tension. Dirty talk (a personal favorite of my hero in Exposure Therapy) can be fun because often it's pushing the other character out of their comfort zone.

 

A sense of humor can come in handy

Love scenes don't have to be totally serious. Kissing or getting naked with someone can be awkward and a little humor and sarcasm can help ease nerves and bring the characters closer together. I find playful sarcasm sneaking into most of my love scenes. It's okay for them to laugh, too.

 

Write what you feel comfortable with and what is right for the characters.

Love scenes don't have to be fully described (although they can be). You can shut the door and fade to black. It can be a simple kiss. You have to be comfy with the amount you're letting your reader see. And make sure it's appropriate for your character. If you're character is a virgin, don't write a scene where she acts like a pro.

 

Don't fear the naughty. If your story calls for a little or a lot of dirty, and you feel comfortable writing that type of scene go for it.

If your hero is a notorious badass and playboy, he's probably going to be a little raunchier in bed. And raunchy doesn't have to mean it's porn. If you put in emotion and have built appropriate tension, even a threesome with all the four letter words used can be engaging and romantic. (Really, I promise.) And stop worrying about if your grandmother is going to read it. You're an adult, get over it. :p 

 

Remember the POV you're writing in.

If you are in the hero's point of view, remember that guys are going to think in a different way than the woman. He's probably not having flowery thoughts (maybe love thoughts, but not flowery). And he's hopefully not going to refer to his uh, friend, as his love sword in his head, lol. 

 

Speaking of love swords...

Don't use cheesy euphemisms and purple prose. You don't have to use the clinical or crude terms (although you can depending on what you're writing), but use ones that don't make your readers laugh or roll their eyes.

 

Make sure it's the right time.

Don't put in a love scene just cause you think you need one. Motivate it properly. And it MUST move the plot forward and change the people involved in some way. Every scene has to have that purpose.

 

Sources: Writing Erotic Romance and Fiction Factor. Another great source (for the 18 and up crowd) author Stacia Kane's Sex Writing Strumpet series of blogs.

 

And last bit of advice: if your heart isn't racing while you write the scene, you're doing something wrong. You should be anticipating that scene as much as you want your reader to. The first love scene I wrote for my romance, I was sweating by the end of it, lol.

 

So do you have any tips on writing these scenes? Do you find them difficult to write? (For me they are hard, but so much fun at the same time.) What's one of your favorite love scenes from a book/movie/tv show? Which author do you think writes the best sexual tension/love scenes?


No! No! Bad Writer*

 

L&S Rules for Students 3
Photo by Michael Stout (click pic for link)

 

Growing up, I was a girl who (except for the occasional rebellious moment) followed the rules. I wanted my parents, family, and teachers to be proud of me. I did what I was supposed to, got the As, and developed a bit of a perfectionistic personality. In many ways, this was a good thing. On the other hand, worrying about perfection is a bit maddening because of course it can never be achieved.

When I started to get serious about my writing, I jumped in and just started typing. I didn't pick up a writing book, read an agent blog, or do a lick of research. Very unlike me. But the creative juices were churning and I needed to get the words on the page before I did anything else. Once I finished my first draft, I took a breath and started to read more about writing. And boy, oh boy, there was enough out there to send me into a near panic attack.
There was so much I didn't know, so many rules I had never heard of. I thought with a firm grasp on grammer, an idea about story structure, and the show don't tell rule, I was good to go. I had no idea there was a written (and unwritten) code of the do's and don'ts of writing. This, of course, sent my anal-retentiveness into overdrive. I jumped into editing and tried to fix the things I had no idea were wrong the first time around. Then, draft after draft, I would discover a new rule I wasn't aware of and would have to go back through again. It was liking trying to break the code into a secret society.
And it hasn't stopped yet. I'm still learning new things every day. At times, it's overwhelming, but I want my manuscripts to be as good as they can be, so I'll keep reading and going to workshops and absorbing all I can.
2015 Update: However, I've also learned that rules are not rules. They're guidelines. Writing shouldn't be "perfect" according to some list. That's boring. You have to find your own style, your own voice, your comfort zone with the so-called "rules." But these do exist for a reason. So it's important to know these things and why they exist. Then you're informed and can break them wisely. Because if you're going to break them, you need to know why you're doing that and then do it well. 
What I Done Learnt So Far:
  1. Adverbs are the devil incarnate. They will steal the soul of your verbs.
  2. Excessive adjectives are like white shoes after Labor Day.
  3. Prologues can be a crutch (though, can also be done well.)
  4. Non-said dialogue tags (he growled, she shouted, he bellowed) are like big, fat "I'm a new writer" billboards in your manuscript
  5. The being verbs are the ugly stepchildren of the verb family
  6. You want verbs that go to the gym--nice and strong.
  7. Rhetorical questions in query letters make agents burn your letter in a weekly bonfire.
  8. Backstory should be slipped in like roofies into a drink--your reader didn't even notice it happened.
  9. Present Participial phrases are generally bad. (This one is a new discovery for me. Editortorent has a whole series on PPPs alone.)
  10. Hidden/Buried Dialogue is not preferred and slows down your pacing. (This one is also new to me. My handy dandy critique group gave me a lesson on this one recently. Apparently, dialogue passages need to be in one of the following structures:
  • dialogue -->narrative-->dialogue
  • narrative-->dialogue
  • dialogue-->narrative
NOT narrative-->dialogue-->narrative OR (my personal favorite) Dialogue-->narrative-->dialogue-->narrative. Don't bury dialogue in the middle of narrative. I did this all over the place, including the submissions I currently have with agents--sigh).
There are hundreds of more "rules" out there, but these are the ones you'll hear most often.
What writing rules have you discovered that you never knew existed? Which rule do you disagree with? Which one is your biggest enemy--the one who sneaks in your writing all the time?
**Today's Theme Song**
"Know Your Enemy"-- Green Day
(player in sidebar, take a listen)