The Fun of Finding New-to-You Music

Music has always been a big part of my life. I don’t play an instrument like my husband or kiddo, but I’ve always been a big fan. This love was planted early by my mom. She taught aerobics in the 80s as her second job, and I can remember sitting with her and her stack of 45s (records), trying to find just the right songs for her routines.

As I developed my own taste, I shifted into listening to my favorite radio stations, painstakingly waiting for my favorite songs to come on so I could hit Record, and making mixtapes for my Walkman. (Yes, kids, this is how we had to do it, lol.) Eventually, technology advanced and I moved to filling up fat CD binders that I could organize and lovingly flip through. I still have two of those binders even though I have no CD player. I can’t seem to part with them.

Of course, now we have streaming and almost every song we could want at our fingertips, but I find that having the ability to make endless personalized playlists means I’m not exposed as much to music I don’t already know. And I don’t necessarily mean “new” songs but “new to me” songs. I end up making playlists of my favorite songs and listening on repeat (and my master playlist is 80 hours long, so I don’t even have to repeat every often.)

But the fun of discovery and hearing a new song on the radio is lost. This is a bummer in general but also, it’s been shown that listening to music, particularly new-to-us music, is really good for our brains. In addition, I find music really inspiring for my writing. There are some songs that the first time I hear them, I think “I could write a story from that.” Music hits me in a different place than other types of inspiration.

So, I’ve started to make an effort to find new-to-me music. How? Here are some fun ways I’ve found:

1. Watching music competition shows like The Voice and American Idol

   I’ve always loved these types of shows, so that’s nothing new. However, I’ve realized that these shows have been a solid source of new music discoveries for me too. The first time I heard one of my (now) very favorite songs, Sara Bareilles’ “She Used to Be Mine”, was on one of these shows.

2. Books About Music

   There’s a book for everything, right? A few years ago I bought 1001 Songs You Must Hear Before You Die and 1001 Albums You Must Hear Before You Die for the kidlet (who loves music and plays guitar and drums.) Even though he’s 16 now, we still read an entry from one of these together each night. Digging into why a song or album is important makes you want to go and listen to them. And from that article I linked to above, I discovered someone actually created a Random Album Generator based on the book, so you can play with that even if you don’t have the book!

3. Best of Lists

   This is similar to the books but easier to get your hands on. Right now I’m working my way through Rolling Stones’ 500 Greatest Albums of All Time list. I’m working backward and am at number 489 (listening to that as I type this in fact!). But this has been such a fun exercise so far. I listen to each album from start to finish, not on shuffle, listening to it as it was intended since songs were put in a certain order for a reason. (I’ve blogged before about The Joy of Listening to an Album All the Way Through.)

   And because I’m sticking to the order of the list, I get quite a variety, going from Shakira to Boys II Men to The Ronettes. My brain is definitely getting some exercise! (Although, let’s be honest, I knew every song on that Boys II Men album by heart, lol. Not all of these are new-to-me.)

There are of course other ways to find new music. Going to concerts and getting there in time for the opening bands, asking friends for recs, listening to a radio station, letting the Spotify algorithms guide you, etc. But the ones above have been the most convenient and enjoyable for me.

It doesn’t really matter how you get there, but if you want to change things up from the same old same old of your tried-and-true playlists, maybe give some of these options a shot.

I’d love to hear if you ever search out new music or how you find new things to listen to. Give me your own tips. Or share the best new-to-you song you’ve discovered lately!

I'm taking a 6-month sabbatical.

Starting next week, I’m taking a six-month sabbatical. Some things will continue: promo for my next book when July gets closer, the RAD Reading podcast, and my Substack newsletter. Most of my social media will be put on pause except for book announcements. I’m putting a hold on teaching clases. I’m also taking a break from writing under deadline.

I explain why I’m doing this and what the process will look like in my Substack letter today if you’d like to read more.

The Weekend Project That Is Making Me Happy: Making Pizza From Scratch

First, for those of you who have reached out during the epic winter storm Texas has been going through, my family and I are safe. We had power cycling on and off every hour for 3.5 days and some of our pipes froze, but we were able to stay warm and safe, so we were luckier than many others. We now have power back and things are thawing you.

Now, on to something much more pleasant—pizza!

I know that pandemic bread baking has been a thing over the last year, so I’m not introducing something novel, but I thought I’d share an offshoot of bread-baking that has been bringing some joy over at our house—making pizza from scratch.

It all started with hubs falling into the rabbit hole of watching David Portnoy’s pizza reviews. There was one about a guy making pizza in his apartment, taking donations, and then lowering pizzas out of his window with a pulley system to those who had donated. Portnoy gave the pizza high marks and was impressed with the crust this guy was getting with a home oven and a baking steel. So hubs came to me to show me the video and then asked if I could research baking steels.

Cue me now falling into the rabbit hole too, lol. Not of pizza reviews but of pizza making.

One cookbook, a hunt for double zero flour, and a baking steel later…I starting making pizza from scratch. And y’all, it’s been amazing. Like truly. I’m picky about pizza and want a good wood-fired crust and never thought I could create that effect at home. I was wrong. Behold…

Although I would consider myself an experienced home cook (I have quite the cookbook obsession), I am not an experienced baker. So I was totally intimidated by the thought of trying to make dough and getting it to rise and shaping it and all the things. And when I first flipped through the cookbook I’m going to recommend below, I was like, yeah, I’m in over my head. The recipes didn’t even START until page 100 because of all the explanations and photos.

But when I actually just said, screw it, I’m going to try it, and if it sucks, oh well I ended up making really great pizza right out the gate. Crispy bottom, slightly charred edges and delicious sauce. The instructions LOOKED intimidating but, in practice, were totally doable. All that step by step instruction in the book helped so much.

So, I thought I’d post about the experience in case you might want to give it a try but don’t know where to start. I will admit that there is a bit of equipment shopping needed to get the right tools, so I’ll list what we bought below.

The Cookbook

The Elements of Pizza: Unlocking the Secrets to World-Class Pies at Home [A Cookbook]

By Forkish, Ken

Yes, I’m sure there are a million free recipes online. But I wanted a cookbook to walk me through every step with photos. I’d seen The Elements of Pizza by Ken Forkish recommended in numerous places, and I was not disappointed. The pizza sauce recipe inside is worth the price alone and it’s literally the simplest most basic sauce ever, but I could eat it with a spoon like soup.

This book has great photos, great recipes, and walks you through every step. If you get it, I’ve been using the “I Slept In But I Want Pizza Tonight” dough recipe. I like this one because I can start prepping dough around 11am and have three dough balls all risen and ready to stretch and top by dinner time.

The Equipment

The Pizza Steel

Artisan Steel - High Performance Pizza Steel Made in the USA - 16" x 14.25" (.25" Thick) Buy on Amazon

This seems to be the game changer. I have a baking stone. This is not that. This is literally a heavy piece of steel that you put in your oven and heat for an hour at high temps before you put your pizza in. It gets screaming hot and then when you slide in your pizza, it cooks in 5-10 minutes depending on what kind you’re making. It gets the crust crispy and gets you that wood-fired oven effect. This is the one I purchased. Just be careful. The sucker is heavy. Only handle it with two hands and when it’s cool.

The Pizza Peel

Checkered Chef Pizza Peel Extra Large Pizza Paddle Stainless Steel With Folding Handle Buy on Amazon

You’ll need this to slide the pizza in and out of the super hot oven. The cookbook recommends a wooden peel. I couldn’t find that kind so I went with a metal one. It worked well as long as I floured the surface enough.

A Dough Tub

I don’t know if this was 100% necessary but I already had one and I find it very useful. You can mix the dough by hand right in the tub and then cover it while it does its first rise. The bonus of this method is you don’t need a fancy stand mixer. I have one and never had to fire it up.

Something to blend sauce

This can be whatever you have on hand—a blender, a hand blender, a food processor. But if you’re making from scratch sauce from whole canned tomatoes, you’ll need something to blend it. I used my hand blender.

Specialty Ingredients

Aren’t my dough balls pretty? ;)

This isn’t a must have, but I’m passing it along because it’s what I’m using. I haven’t tried the recipe with regular flour, though the cookbook does say you can use substitutions. The “best” is supposed to be double zero flour. We were able to find it at Central Market here in Texas. My guess is you could also find it at Whole Foods or online if your local store doesn’t carry it.

Those are the main things you need. The sauce and topping ingredients are all basics you can get at the grocery store. And I know this list may sound intimidating, but once you have it, you can make pizza whenever you want!

So far we’ve made some basics like pepperoni and margherita, but we also tried a prosciutto and arugula one and the Brooklyn Hot Honey from the cookbook (it’s one of the photos above) and they were all so yummy. I can’t wait to try more.

And in a pandemic, with all the stress of the world going on, I find it really relaxing and satisfying to take on a cooking project that is slow and methodical and has visible results. Plus, it’s so rewarding when I slide that pizza out of the oven and it looks (and tastes) better than I could get in most restaurants. Highly recommend pizza therapy! ;)

So, what have been some of your pandemic projects?

Stay-at-Home Tips & Apps for Maintaining (Some) Sanity

Hi. How are you doing? I hope you and yours are doing okay.

Here at the Loren household, we’re trying to stay cognizant of the fact that we are very lucky to be home and safe right now, that being “stuck” at home is a blessing. Hubs is in a service/entertainment industry that is shut down right now, so that is stressful, but in the grand scheme of things, we are okay. We have a place to live, are healthy right now, and have food to eat.

So, I try to take a moment every day to be grateful for those things and grateful for the people who are helping that happen (all the love to grocery store workers, delivery drivers, health care workers, police, firefighters, and everyone else who is on the front lines.)

However, having said all that, it doesn’t mean that being home non-stop with each other is without its difficulties—as I’m sure you’re all experiencing, too. Our routines have been annihilated. Our world is a completely different one than we knew for all of ours lives. It’s a lot.

So, in today’s post, I thought I would share some of the little things that are helping us get through right now in case any may be of help to you.

On Deciding What to Watch - Two Helpful Apps

Most of us are probably watching way more TV and many more movies than we normally would. Usually, it’s not a matter of trying to figure out what to watch but when to find time to watch all the great things people have recommended to you.

However, now that we may have more time to watch, we have new challenges. One of them being that many of us are home with children, so we can’t just put on anything. We have to watch things that are appropriate for the age-level of our kids.

I feel lucky that I only have a 12-year old at home. He’s gotten to an age where I can introduce him to a lot of movies I love because I don’t need to be as careful about curse words or mild sexual innuendo. But sometimes it’s still hard to tell if a movie is safe for him to watch or not. So, one of my favorite websites/apps that I have been using on a daily basis lately is Common Sense Media.

Common Sense Media

This website has a huge database of movies, and not only does it give age recommendations, it gives actual breakdowns of the levels of sex, violence, language, positive messages, etc. for each movie.

If you click on those ratings, it tells you the actual content from the movie that applies. So, for instance, if you click on the sex rating, it will say (as was the case when I looked up Nightmare on Elm Street the other night) specifically what is seen. So, in that movie, it was teens have sex and you hear sounds, but then only the end when they’re done is seen. No nudity. At another point, you see the side of a breast in shadow.

This is enormously helpful because you know your own kid and what you think they can handle or not handle. For instance, I know my son isn’t particularly scared by horror movies with supernatural stuff because he’s a logical guy who doesn’t believe in that stuff (which is SO unlike me as a kid, when I was definitely convinced my room was haunted.) So, a movie that would keep another kid up with nightmares, is usually fine for my kiddo. However, anything with nudity beyond a bare butt for comedy’s sake (like every Will Ferrell movie), I’m going to rule out.

In addition to all the ratings, they also include parent and kid reviews of the movies, which are super helpful not just for gauging content but to see if kids generally like the movie. I want to share a lot of my favorite 80s and 90s movies with my son. Some translate well. Some age badly. So seeing what other kids his age thought of the movie can help.

This website and the app are free, but I’d absolutely pay for this service. It’s fantastic.

Just Watch

The next app/website I find myself opening all the time is the Just Watch app. I am not one to scroll through my streaming services and choose what to watch. I tend to be someone who gets an idea of what movie or TV show I want to watch and then has to find it. As someone who subscribes to a lot of streaming services—Netflix, Hulu, Amazon, Apple, Shudder, etc., that can be a lot of work to go in and search each one.

Just Watch saves you the trouble of figuring that out. All you need to do is type in what movie or show you’re looking for, and it will tell you where it is streaming and if it’s included in your subscription or if you have to rent or buy it. It also gives you movie info and things like the Rotten Tomato rating. Quick and easy.

With those two apps in my pocket, I’ve been able to be a pretty good movie curator over at our house. Here are some of the things we’ve watched lately that have been a thumbs up from the whole fam:

• Pitch Perfect

• The Wedding Singer

• Talladega Nights

• A League of Their Own

• Nightmare on Elm Street (but OMG the melodramatic early 80s horror movie acting)

• Wayne’s World

• Groundhog Day
  
  

On Trying to Focus When Working From Home

I work from home normally, but I’ve never had to work from home while everyone is here with me—a kid homeschooling, me cooking three meals a day, a husband popping in to ask questions or to get me to go on a walk. I have pretty high focus, in general, because I’ve worked over the years to hone that. However, this has knocked me for a loop. Constant interruption is tough. So here’s what I’m doing:

Focus @ Will

I’ve used Focus @ Will for years now, so that part is nothing new. But I’m having to use it in a different way. This website plays music meant for focus (so it’s different than just putting classical music on Spotify.) You can choose your theme. I pretty much live on the cinematic setting. You set your time for a session, there’s a Pavlovian style “ding” sound that indicates a session has started (and is embarrassingly effective at cueing me that it’s time to work) and then the music starts.

Usually, I just listen through my desktop, but since the stay-at-home order, I’ve figured out that I need to use it with headphones when other people are home. I can’t get into deep focus otherwise. So when it’s time to write (because I still have a book deadline coming up), I put on my headphones, hit play, and then try to have at least an hour of uninterrupted time. It’s effective. My son tapped my shoulder the other day when I was in deep work mode under headphones, and I nearly levitated out of my chair, lol. He thought it was hilarious.

Social Media Break

Right now, it’s hard not to get consumed by media in all its forms. There is a lot to know, but there is also a lot of noise. I realized that I was getting lost in the despair of social media and needed a break. I’ve done 30-Day social media breaks and such before, so I know they can work to quiet my mind.

So, last week I took the week off from social media. It helped a lot. I’m back on now but limiting my dose. I’m finding Instagram is generally uplifting right now, so I’m giving myself some time there. Facebook I’m limiting because it’s a mixed bag. I’m still avoiding Twitter because I find the amount of negative posts there far outweigh the positive ones. So, consider taking a break or curating which channels you check. We want to connect socially while stuck at home, but it doesn’t have to be in ways that make us feel bad or drained after using them.

On Trying to Sleep

Everyone at my house has been having trouble sleeping. All the anxiety, disruption of routine, and lack of energy expenditure have contributed. We’ve had some rough nights with kidlet knocking on our door because he couldn’t sleep or me tossing and turning until four a.m. And when we don’t get sleep, everyone suffers because we’re all in bad moods.

So this past week, we’ve been working on a few things, trying to see if it will help. I’m happy to report that we’ve found a couple of things that seem to be working.

Headspace & Meditation

I’ve tried meditation off and on through the years. I tend not to stick with it, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t found it helpful. This time, I decided to try it with kidlet because he was having so much trouble settling down at night. In the past, I’ve used the Calm app and liked it, but after researching, I found that Headspace had some kid options and was a bit more simplified. So I went with that one.

For the past few days, I’ve been doing a 5-10 minute meditation with kidlet before bed. Most of the ones we’ve done focus on breathing, on counting backward, on relaxing muscles, etc. So it’s been easy for him to follow. We’ve noticed a difference. The nights we’ve meditated, he hasn’t come knocking on our door in the middle of the night. And now he’s asking for it, “Can we meditate before bed, mom?” So I’m really happy with how it’s helping. I’ve done some sessions separately from him when it’s time for me to go to bed, and it has helped my racing thoughts. So two thumbs up on the meditation.

Not Watching the News at Night

This one is tough because with everything going on, we feel like we need to be constantly updated. However, I think part of the reason I wasn’t sleeping was because we were watching the nightly news right before we went to sleep. Even if we watched something funny or lighthearted, afterward, the effect lingered.

The past fews days I’ve avoided watching the news after the 6 o’ clock news, and it’s helped. I still watch Good Morning America when I wake up and then that 6pm news. That keeps me updated enough. I don’t leave the TV on in the background. I don’t watch the endless press conferences. I don’t need my brain in crisis mode 24/7. (I’ve talked about this before in this post: Self-Care for the Highly Sensitive Person - It’s Okay to Step Away From the News

On Keeping Spirits Up

One of the most important things right now is keeping our spirits up. Because if we don’t actively try to do this, it’s really easy to fall into a pit of despair. That does no one any good. So here are some of the things that are helping us keep our mood from crashing:

Sunlight & Walks

As someone who has suffered from a Vitamin D deficiency in the past, I’m a sunlight evangelist. (Also, I’d recommend still taking some Vitamin D in a pill because most of us don’t get enough naturally.) Sunlight gives us so many things—vitamin D, a mood lift, and help setting our body clocks. And especially right now, with all of us spending so much time inside, sunlight can feed the soul.

Now, you need to do this in a safe way. If you live in a tightly packed area, this might mean just going out on your balcony or standing in front of an open window. But if you have the ability and the space, going outside daily for walks in the sunshine or just to sit on your porch can be so helpful.

We’re very lucky that the new house we moved into is in a rural-ish area so we have lots of animals to see on our walks. But it’s nice just to see the grass and flowers sprouting for Spring, hear the birds singing. It’s a reminder for me that the world goes on. This too shall pass.

Here are some of our animal friends we’ve seen lately:

A To Do List & Routines

I’m a person who thrives on routines and To Do lists, so this is a given for me if I want to maintain sanity. But even for my kiddo and husband, who are more flexible than I am, need some kind of routine. Getting up in the morning and not having anything to do, no purpose to the day, can become depressing really quickly.

I’m currently in the position of having too much to do—book deadline, putting together a class, taking a different class, blogging, newslettering, etc. So my problem is opposite—how to fit it in while having everyone home. But my husband who is used to being crazy busy with his job doesn’t have that kind of list while his job is mostly on pause. So he’s had to make sure to set goals for the day, little things sometimes, but tasks he wants to get done. And my kiddo has homeschool and online music lessons, so he has some tasks going, but it’s been a challenge to impose new routines.

So, if you’re finding yourself feeling unmoored during the day, don’t rule out making an old fashioned To Do list. And it doesn’t have to be something practical like cleaning the kitchen. Maybe you want to reorganize your bookshelves by color of cover or you want to pick up a cookbook and learn some new recipes. It may mean that you want to make a list of shows you’ve been meaning to binge watch. Start a movie/TV journal to record your thoughts about what you’re watching or a book journal.

Find a project. It can do wonders.

A Treat to Look Forward To

Kidlet and I have been doing a lot of baking of desserts. Normally, we only have desserts in the house on special occasions because we’re trying not to eat too much sugar and all that. However, during this time, though you don’t want to go crazy with eating junk because that won’t make you feel very good, it can be really nice to have a treat to look forward to. Knowing that after dinner, we have a homemade dessert is a nice uplifting thing. And there’s no shame in using boxed mix (like this delicious cinnamon crumble cake below.)

And it may not be desserts for you. It may be an activity or a TV show or a book. But have something to look forward to each day, a little something that maybe you normally wouldn’t have if we weren’t in this situation, can really help.

Board Games

We need a break from all the screens sometimes, and board games are a great option. If you’re competitive like my family, it’s also a guaranteed way to take our focus off of what is happening in the world and getting lost in an activity together.

Some of our favorites lately have been Ticket to Ride and Ticket to Ride Nordic Countries (best for 3 players), Scattergories, Upwords, and Yahtzee. The latter three are good if you’re too tired to focus. The first two require more strategy.

Reading

I know I’m preaching to the choir here, but I wanted to bring this one up because I’ve noticed my reading habits have changed during this. I’m having more trouble focusing on reading, even though that’s something I normally do to relax. And just an observation, but it seems that people who normally aren’t voracious readers are reading more now, but those of us who are heavy readers are having more of a struggle. It’s almost like whatever is opposite our norm is what’s happening during this crisis.

So, if you happen to be one of those heavy readers who is having trouble reading, I encourage you to consider reading outside your normal zone. Shake up your routine a little. Maybe it’s a different genre or subgenre. Maybe it’s doing an audiobook instead of an ebook. (You can join my Read Wide challenge and get a list of different categories and genres to work through.) For me, I picked up a paranormal romance. I read those on occasion, but it’s not my main zone, and it seems to be engaging me more. I’m also reading a non-fiction book in between when I can’t focus on fiction.

Or, you may be the opposite and need to lean heavily into your reading comfort zone. Maybe that means re-reading old favorites because it gives you some stability to know what’s coming.

All I’m saying is that if your normal reading routine isn’t working, shake it up and see if you can come at it from another angle because I know, for most of us, reading is food for our soul and needed.

---

All right. I know I’ve thrown a lot at you, but I hope you’ve found something in there that’s helpful. I’m sending you and your family love and well wishes. Be safe, y’all. Stay home. Stay sane. <3

—Roni

Coping with Covid-19 Anxiety: A Few Ideas

Hey there. So add this to the list of posts I’d never thought I’d write. I’ve been in my home office all day, trying to focus on getting something done—anything—but I’m sure like most of you, focus (already in short supply for many of us) is hard to come by right now. My kiddo is home with me, trying to do school online. My husband is out, helping the locations he manages shut down for business for at least two weeks (he’s in a retail/entertainment field.) And here I am, working from home as usual, but nothing feels like business as usual at all.

I’m sure you have your own version of this going on wherever you are. And I know there are many out there who are facing much more difficult things —layoffs, ill family members, or illness itself. Know that I am sending out love and good wishes to all of you.

This post will not be be able to address the big, life-changing issues many are facing, but I’m hoping that maybe it can help with some of the more common ones. Anxiety. Feeling stir-crazy. Feeling isolated. Or not being able to get a break from your kiddos. This is new territory for all of us, so I thought it might be helpful to pass along some of the things I hope to implement to help make the situation a little better.

1. Turn off the news for a while

   Yes, we need to be informed, but 24-hour news is good for no one. I’ve found that if I tune in first thing in the morning, catching the first part of Good Morning America and the local news, I’ll get the most vital new information. Then I tune in again at night for the nightly news. In between, I turn it off.

   Especially if you’re prone to anxiety or are very high empathy, you need to limit your exposure. I also recommend choosing your main source of trusted online news. I subscribe to the online New York Times and have for a few years now, and I always find the subscription worth it. If you use that link, you can get a subscription for about a dollar a week and they’ll also donate money to give access to public school students. (It’s an affiliate link, but I don’t get anything back for you using that link except that it triggers the school donation.)

2. Find an activity you can lose yourself in

   If you’re here, my guess is that one of those is reading. That’s one of my go to self-care activities. A good book can transport me to a place where I don’t have to worry about ALL THE THINGS for a little while. The type of book you need in a time like this may vary, and don’t be surprised if your normal favorite genre doesn’t quite scratch the itch like it normally does.

   Some find it surprising that pandemic stories are selling well all of a sudden. It doesn’t surprise me. I’m that person who leans into fictional horror when I’m anxious. It’s a way for some to process anxiety in a “safe” environment. I found myself grabbing Stephen King’s The Stand off my shelf today. So don’t judge yourself if your book craving isn’t what you’d expect.

   But, you may need the exact opposite and want a guaranteed HEA romance. If that’s the case, you can find a bunch of recommendations here on the blog. I also changed the prices to my two indie books By the Hour and Blurring the Lines to 99 cents today to try to help in any way I can. If money is suddenly tighter for you, you can get those two books for less than 2 bucks. (*NOTE: The systems take a little while to change the price online, so if it’s still the higher price when you check, check again tomorrow. I’ll post on my social media when the prices are live.)

   And if reading isn’t doing it for you right now, maybe it’s streaming that show you’ve had in your queue forever or binge-watching superhero movies. Maybe it’s baking so much you’d put Martha Steward to shame. You do you. Whatever gives your brain a respite for a while.

3. Take on a project

   A lot of us have projects that we put on the back burner or on the “want to do someday” list. If we’re stuck at home, maybe now is the time to tackle it. Paint your bedroom. Reorganize the closets. Learn how to play guitar. Set up a card catalog for your books (or is that just my nerdy fantasy?) Try your hand at writing your own story.

   For me, this week I built a new website for my writing classes. You can see it here at the Fearless Romance Writing Academy. I also built a 30-Day email challenge for romance writers: 30 Days of Romance Writing Prompts. If you’re a writer or aspire to be, you can grab that challenge for free by clicking that link.

   But I can confirm that once I got started on both of those projects, I lost myself in them for hours. It was so nice not to think about anything else but the project in front of me. And then that sense of achievement when it’s done is quite the mood booster.

4. Get outside

   This is one I have to remind myself of. Unfortunately, it’s been rainy here in Texas the last few days, but I’ve tried to make a point to get some fresh air when I can. I live next to cows, so when they showed up by the fence today I went out and had a conversation with them. They seemed bored by my ramblings, but their good listening skills are quite soothing. ;)

   But really, fresh air and sunshine are important. We are supposed to be social distancing, but if you have an outdoor space you can access without coming into close contact with others—a yard, a balcony, etc.—remember to use it.

5. Take your vitamins

   I am militant about Vitamin D after having a deficiency a few years ago that completely crashed my mood, immunity levels, and made me start losing hair among other symptoms. And I managed to get deficient in the SUMMER. Now that we’re going to be outside less often, it’s even more important. Take a multi-vitamin at the very least. (I take a multi plus an extra D supplement and a probiotic.) Vitamins are good for mood, immunity, and overall health. I can attest to how a deficiency can cause all kinds of issues. And vitamins cheap and easy.

6. Still reach out to friends and family—virtually

   I’m an introvert. I can have low social interaction for a while and, frankly, not notice. But even I can feel the ripple of anxiety that comes with knowing I can’t go have queso and margaritas with my friends if I wanted to. So make a point to stay connected to friends and family.

   We live in a time of unprecedented technology. As I type this, my son is taking his School of Rock lesson over a Zoom video call with his instructor. So, video chat with your friends. Or even plan to watch a TV show or movie together while you’re on the phone with them. Reach out to your family, especially older members whose anxiety levels are probably very high.

   We are social creatures, and cutting ourselves off from everyone for too long will take a toll. Also be aware of this with your kiddos. Let them have their phone time or video chatting time.

7. Exercise

   You know exercise, that thing we always say we would do more of if we just had more time? No? Just me using that avoidance tactic? Well, we all know exercise is good for us. For our bodies. Our immunity. Our mental health. There are endless resources online to take classes or learn routines. I have always enjoyed yoga from Yoga with Adriene.

8. Take on a defined challenge

   I love checking off a list. And I like being a completist. Like I watched Julie and Julia the other night (soothing movie, btw) and I know some people thought what Julie did was a little nuts—cooking all the recipes from Julia Child’s French cooking tome—but I was like YAASSS GIRL. I totally get that desire to take on a specific challenge like that and the ultimate satisfaction of completing it. (That’s why you see me doing things like the 30-Day No Social Media Challenge.) I love that s**t.

   So, I know not everyone is wired that way. But if you are, look for a challenge you can do at home and complete. The 30-Day Romance Writing Prompt challenge I mentioned above could work if you’re a romance writer or want to try your hand at writing. But there are endless options. The Read Your TBR challenges. The social media challenges. The watch all the Marvel movies or Harry Potter movies or all seasons of a TV show. I did this with Buffy the Vampire Slayer a while back. I watched every episode of all 7 seasons and it felt so satisfying. You could pick a show that you’ve never seen (which was the case with me and Buffy) or you can pick an old favorite you want to revisit. Like I could see myself doing that with Friends or Dawson’s Creek.

   I think the beauty of a challenge is that it gives you a small sense of control when you can’t control what’s happening in the outside world.

9. Stay on some kind of schedule

   Yes, we’re home and don’t have to be as regimented. Maybe the alarm clock doesn’t have to go off as early. But schedules can help give us (and our kids) a sense of stability. Having no clear borders in the day can leave everyone feeling unmoored. So, I encourage you to think about some clear markers in your day. We eat breakfast at the table together around this time every day. We work on our things during the day. That may mean school work and chores for kids. For you, that may be working at home, doing housework, taking on a project like recommended above. Then there’s a “quitting time” where everyone can have dinner and relax, watch tv, play games, etc.

   It doesn’t have to be that exact schedule. Maybe you’re a household of night owls or have teens who sleep til noon. That’s fine. You can make the schedule tailored to you and your family’s needs. But having the stability of knowing the windows of time that certain activities happen can give a lot of stability in this unstable situation. (I’ve learned how helpful this can be as someone who works at home full time. I keep my own regimented schedule so that I don’t end up on the couch eating Cheetos and bingeing Netflix at 1pm on a Tuesday.)

10. Don’t murder your children and/or spouse ;)

    Going to jail during a time like this would be SO inconvenient. ;) Yes, being home with everyone ALL THE TIME will be trying no matter how much you love them, but try to give a little grace (you’re probably annoying them, too, lol.) They’re dealing with this total upheaval just like we are.

Love you guys! Stay safe and healthy, and hopefully we’ll all be on the other side of this soon. <3

—Roni

Are you using any creative ways to cope? I’d love to hear them!