Wordiness:The Post in Which I Discuss Reduction of the Aforementioned

I'm a wordy girl. In school, the teachers used to tell us the minimum amount of pages required for a paper. While others were trying to figure out what font would fill the maximum amount of space (Courier New, btw), I would be trying to get my paper under fifteen pages. So I know I have to watch this tendency when I'm writing.

The terrific resources on the RWA site helped me out again. Here are some things to help cut the fluff out of your manuscript.

1. Eliminate and remove redundancy.

Fluffy: She sobbed and tears fell from her eyes as she watched him walk away.

Sleek: Tears fell from her eyes as he walked away.

2. Delete intensifiers that don't intensify.

F: Generally, Mary kept her very deepest emotions hidden.

S: Mary kept her deepest emotions hidden.

(or even better: Mary hid her deepest emotions.)

3. Remove important sounding phrases that don't add to a sentence.

F: All things considered, she was thankful for the outcome.

S: She was thankful for the outcome.

4. Avoid starting sentences with expletives.

No, this doesn't mean curse words. An expletive according to Webster is : "a syllable, word, or phrase inserted to fill a vacancy without adding to the sense." That should tell us all we need to know. (it was, there are, etc)

F: It was his gaze that made her heart beat faster.

S: His gaze made her heart beat faster.

(Or better: His gaze made her heart pound.)

 

5. Use active instead of passive voice whenever you can.

F: The dishes were washed after dinner by my mother.

S: After dinner, my mother washed the dishes.

6. Reduce clauses to phrases, and reduce phrases to single words.

F: In the very near future, she would have to make a decision.

S: Soon, she would have to decide.

 

7. Remove adjective clauses where you can.

 

F: The girl who lived next door wore a dress that had pink stripes.

S: The girl next door wore a pink striped dress.

 

8. Turn prepositional phrases into one-word modifiers.

F: The captain of the football team always dated the prettiest of the cheerleaders.

S: The football team captain always dated the prettiest cheerleader.

 

9. Cut extraneous words or phrases.

F: We conducted an investigation regarding the murder.

S: We investigated the murder.

 

10. Remove cliches and euphemisms.

F: He had a sneaking suspicion his protests had fallen on deaf ears.

S: He suspected they had ignored his protests.

 

11. Weed out the "to be".

F: Sue found the children to be exhausting.

S: Sue found the children exhausting.

 

12. Avoid stating the obvious.

F: He sat down and realized it was already 6am in the morning.

S: He sat and realized it was already 6am.

 

*This a personal favorite of mine. I naturally write "stood up"--like where else can you stand but up? Grr. I do it all the time.

13. Delete meaningless adverbs.

F: She yelled at him loudly, then ran away quickly.

S: She yelled at him and ran.

 

The source that I pulled this from also has fantastic lists of

Redundant Phrases like

absolutely essential = essential

future plans = plans

Wordy Phrases

A lot of = many

Come to an end = end

And Cliches

sad but true (great Metallica song, but a cliche nonetheless)

give a damn

*This is a repost from October 2009

So are any of you wordy like me? Which of these do you find cropping up in your manuscript the most?

 

**Today's Theme Song**

"More Than Words" - Extreme

(player in sidebar--go ahead, take a listen)

Tweeting Interns: Helpful or Hurtful?

Want to know who won my birthday contest?  You'll have to scroll down to see.  But first, today's topic--the Twitter Queryfest/Queryslam debate.

For those of you who haven't heard about it, here's the gist: there was an anonymous intern on Twitter (InternAmie/Amy Cortese) who would tweet thoughts about the queries as she was reading them. No identifying information was given, but she'd give tidbits like: This memoir has a good premise, but the writing isn't there or sample pages had too much passive voice. It wasn't anything earth-shattering usually, but I know she had a lot of followers (including myself.)

Well, people began to react to it because, despite the vagueness, it still seemed like dangerous waters in terms of confidentiality. It's one of those things that when it's not about YOU, it can be interesting or funny, but then when you start considering it may be your query getting tweeted--well, then it starts feeling a little different. (Just like any other teasing--easy to be in the crowd, not quite as fun to be in the spotlight.)

Agent Janet Reid got wind of what was going on and did a post here on why we shouldn't assume all interns are operating that way and on the inappropriateness of that tweeting intern's actions.

People have a range of opinions. Penelope at Too Cute to Be Very Interesting (whose post sparked mine) found the tweets informative, so was disappointed that InternAmie is now shut down. Others feel very strongly the other way.

Now, for the record, I don't think this intern had bad intentions. I'm sure she thought she was being helpful. But I tend to err on the side of privacy and confidentiality. When I was a management recruiter, I would get hundreds of resumes a week. Therefore, much of my day was spent going through these things. Just like queries, some were great, many were awful. Some made mistakes so glaring that they were laughable.

And I'll admit, amongst my fellow recruiters we did discuss them. i.e. Can you believe this person put SexyHotThing@wherever.com as her email on her resume? Or, look this person's "reason for leaving" for their last job was "my boss was a jerk." Discussing it kept the job sane--it's what people do at work.

BUT, we were discussing it privately amongst ourselves. If we had tweeted that (if Twitter existed back then), we would've been in some serious trouble--written up, fired, etc. because those people didn't give us permission to discuss their information publicly.

Now, hearing agent and intern feedback on queries can be wildly helpful. The workshop I went to at RWA (also called Queryfest) was great. The agents gave honest feedback live as they heard queries read aloud. Some of the feedback was tough. Hearing where agents would stop reading was probably tough on the people who wrote the queries. However, the difference is that those writers VOLUNTEERED. They knew they would be discussed publicly and had given permission for that to happen.

So, in my opinion, I think that's where the line is. Did the person give permission? Because otherwise, you need to put on your empathy shoes and think--if I saw an intern or agent tweet about how terrible my writing/query was, how would I feel?

I think it's fine for agents/interns to tweet overarching things that are helpful. i.e. Too many of the YA queries we're seeing are about werewolves. Or something like that. But when it gets specific, it risks humiliating people and making the agent/intern look unprofessional.

But I'd love to hear all of your opinions. Do you find these kinds of tweets helpful? Did it make you nervous that one day your query would be the subject of that kind of tweet? Do you think people are being too overly sensitive about this issue?

And finally, the winners of last Monday's Birthday contest....

First place: KLM at Cove Awakening 

Second place: Diane at Diane Estrella

Congrats to the winners!!!!  I'll be emailing you about your prize. And thanks to everyone who entered the contest!

Blondism: The Bias Against Fair-Haired Heroes

In case you missed it yesterday, I guest blogged over at Heather Long's Daily Dose about the bias against blond heroes.  Check it out and leave some comment love!

Also, I found out today I'm a finalist in the Heartland Romance Authors' Show Me the Spark! Contest.  Yay!  This was the last contest I entered before signing with Sara, so I'm excited to be a finalist.

And last but not least, remember this weekend is the last chance to enter my birthday contest where you can win a book or critique.  You can sign up here.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Four Levels of Plotter/Pantsers

 

On Wednesday we talked about if a plotter/pantser can change their stripes.  First, thanks for all the comments, it's given me a lot to think about. (Although some of you guys scared me with the I-tried-to-plot-and-it-killed-the-novel-for-good stories, lol.) I think what seems to be important is to figure out what your process is like and then use the methods that play to that.

 For instance, one of the things to consider is where does the novel-writing process start for you.  When you're working on a new idea--what comes to you first? What do you need to have sorted out in your brain before you start writing? I think the answers to those questions defines what type of pantser or plotter you are.

So here are some types I've come up with (feel free to add more in the comments!):

The "True" Pantsers--The Writing Equivalent to Sky-Diving

What they start with: Hardly anything. A first sentence. A hook. A setting.

What they do: Jump into the unknown enthusiastically for the thrill of discovery, hoping the parachute will engage when needed. 

Benefits: Tend to be the people that can bust out a draft at lightning speed. You get to write as soon as the inspiration strikes. Can jump around the story and just write scenes that inspire you at the moment.

Drawbacks: No pre-planning could mean plot holes. Writing and then realizing the story is inherently flawed. Losing inspiration. Having a pile of words that need MAJOR editing at the end of it.

The Clark Griswold Pantser (I talked about this here. This is what I am.)

What they start with: They have some kind of plan starting out (going to Wally World), though inevitably they go off course and end up enjoying the scenery better in the uncharted territory.

What they do: Have something in their back pocket before setting fingers to keys. For instance, for me, I start with characters because I'm a character-driven writer. So, I need to fully flesh out the characters backstories before getting started. I also like to have the inciting incident (or as I like to refer to it--the "oh sh*t" moment) and the major conflict figured out before I start writing. Then I fly into the mist.

Benefits: You feel somewhat prepared going in. You know enough about your characters that when you throw them into situations, you know how they should react. 

Drawbacks: You will inevitably hit blocks where you're not sure where to go next. This can lead to wandering, pointless scenes. This can also mean you go down the wrong path for a while and will have big cuts. 

The Combo Meal or Plotsers

What they start with: A skeleton of a plot and some knowledge of the characters.

What they do: These are people who probably work well with something like the 3-Act structure or the screenplay method. They know the hook, the conflict, the major turning points, the black moment, and where they want to end up. All the individual scenes are discovered as they write.

Benefits: You know where you're going, but still get the excitement of not knowing what's around every little corner.

Drawbacks: Even knowing this much could kill the creativity of a true pantser and not knowing enough could stress out the hard-core plotter. Also, sometimes the big points don't string together like you hoped and then you have to go back to the drawing board.

The Military Precision Plotter

What they start with: They KNOW what happens in the whole story. Every chapter has been outlined, characters have been interviewed, post-it notes have been aligned and color-coded. Scenes are numbered. Corkboards or Scrivener have been utilized.  (Oh, how I envy this type!)

What they do: They outline, plan, brainstorm problems before they even start the story.

Benefits: Less fear of the unknown. Fix problems before they pop up. You know where you're going and how you're going to get there.

Drawbacks: If this isn't your natural way, this can make the process feel clinical and dry and ruin the fun of writing. This takes time, so it may mean less edits on the back-end but you have to be patient on the front end. All the planning doesn't guarantee a great story--until you put words to page, you don't know if it's really going to sing.

So, I'm sure there are endless variations in between all those, but what I think  is important is to figure out where your writing thrives. And my guess is that if you want to be more one way or the other, you probably don't want to venture more than one level either way. For instance, a true plotter will probably never be able to become a true pantser (and vice versa.)  As much as I envy the plotter, I know my best shot is probably shooting for working within the screenplay structure. I'll never be a plot-every-scene-ahead-of-time person.

But I also think it's important to experiment with the different ways in the beginning because you may think you're one thing and are something completely different.

So where do you fall on the scale? Where do you want to be? What other levels/labels do you think would fit in here?


**Also, I'm guest blogging today at Heather Long's Daily Dose. My post is on Blondism: The Bias Against Blond Heroes in Romance.  Check it out here and leave some comment love (there are hot pictures of guys involved)!

**Today's Theme Song**

"Who Are You" - The Who

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

 

Banned Book Review: A Wrinkle In Time

As most of you know, this week is Banned Books week. I recently did a post on the Speak Loudly campaign, so I won't go into all my opinions again on why I don't think books should be banned. But Taherah and Le R had the great idea of celebrating the right to read what we want by selecting a book that's been banned in our history and reviewing it today.

So it's a blogfest of sorts.  If you want to participate, you can still sign up here.

Now onto my selection...(and let me tell you, I was shocked to find this on the most banned list.)

A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle

Blurb (from Amazon): It was a dark and stormy night; Meg Murry, her small brother Charles Wallace, and her mother had come down to the kitchen for a midnight snack when they were upset by the arrival of a most disturbing stranger.

"Wild nights are my glory," the unearthly stranger told them. "I just got caught in a downdraft and blown off course. Let me sit down for a moment, and then I'll be on my way. Speaking of ways, by the way, there is such a thing as a tesseract."

A tesseract (in case the reader doesn't know) is a wrinkle in time. To tell more would rob the reader of the enjoyment of Miss L'Engle's unusual book. A Wrinkle in Time, winner of the Newbery Medal in 1963, is the story of the adventures in space and time of Meg, Charles Wallace, and Calvin O'Keefe (athlete, student, and one of the most popular boys in high school). They are in search of Meg's father, a scientist who disappeared while engaged in secret work for the government on the tesseract problem.

Okay, so the blurb doesn't do it justice.  But this is the book that made me want to become a writer.  Hearing this story for the first time is still burned into my memory. I was in 5th grade (at Catholic school no less) and my teacher Ms. Hymel decided that at the end of each day for the last fifteen minutes of each class, she would read A Wrinkle In Time to us aloud.

I'm telling you, I was so impacted that I can remember exactly where I was sitting in the classroom when she read. The story just sucked me in. I was an avid reader already at that age but mostly of Babysitter's Club and YA ghost stories and such, but I had never read fantasy before.

Always the impatient one (some things never change), I proceeded straight to the library and checked out the book so I didn't have to wait all semester to find out what happened. I then went on to read the entire series, which was fabulous and completely swept me away. And at that time in my life--being swept away to another world was just what I needed.  Things had been difficult at home, both my mom and dad got remarried (to other people) that year, so I was losing my "just me and mom" status at home. So this book was part of what helped me cope with all the stuff going on in my "real" world.

And at the end of reading that series I decided I wanted to be a writer. How cool of a job would it be to create whole new worlds and be able to go there anytime you want?

So I'd hate to think how differently things might have been if I had been denied the opportunity to read those books and escape when I needed it the most. So thank you to Ms. Hymel (I thinks she still may be teaching at my same school) for reading something to us that wasn't on our "scheduled" reading list and thank you to Madeleine L'Engle for writing the books that inspired me.

If you want to participate in this blogfest and review a book, you can find the lists of the most banned books here. And if you haven't read A Wrinkle in Time--get thee to the library or bookstore!  It's a must read.

So what book made you want to be a writer? What banned book are you glad you had the opportunity to read?

**Today's Theme Song**

"We're Not Gonna Take It" - Twisted Sister

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

Can a Plotter or Pantser Change Their Stripes?

I've mentioned before that I'm a pantser by nature and tend to stick to the flying-into-the-mist method. Discovering that was actually rather surprising based on the rest of my life. I tend to be a planner, love a routine, and organizing (though not cleaning) makes me very happy. And don't even get me started on office supplies. A trip to Staples is way too exciting for me.

I'm also a perfectionist. No fast-drafting and fix later for me. No I can't resist editing as a I go.

So it stands to reason that I should be a plotter, right?  Just think of all those colorful post-it notes and cork boards I could buy. But I've tried.  Tried to outline, to plot ahead. I WANT to plot ahead. Not knowing what's coming next is not exhilarating for me, it's stressful. The unknown makes me anxious. What if I can't come up with what comes next? What if none of it makes sense once it's strung together? What if I hit page 200 and realize this story doesn't work at all?

Luckily, so far, those fears have been unwarranted, but it doesn't mean they don't pop up the next time I'm brainstorming a new project (which I'm doing right now.)

I went to a workshop last year that talked about the brain patterns of plotters vs. pantsers, and research has shown that we are different. That plotting can kill a pantser's creativity and ruin their passion for the story. And in contrast, NOT having a plan can freeze up the creativity of a plotter.

I took comfort in that workshop, but now it's got me wondering if you're bound to your own style.  Does this mean I can't learn to be a plotter?  I mean, when I went to Michael Hauge's screenwriting workshop last year, I got all excited about the structure and thought--I want to plan my next story that way!  And then Tiffany Reisz (erotica author and agency sister) sent me links to the Alexandra Sokoloff's index card method, which looks really cool, too.

So, now I'm wondering if I should give it a shot with this next book. If I'm lucky enough to sell this current book (officially on submission with editors this week, btw!) and get published, then I'm going to have to learn how to sell books on proposal BEFORE they are written--which means I have to plot ahead at least somewhat.

So what do you think? Can a pantser/plotter change their stripes and do it the other way? Should they? And what camp do you fall in--do you think you could write with the opposite technique if needed?

**Today's Theme Song**

"Into the Mystic" - Van Morrison

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

Birthday Contest!

So despite the fact that today is Monday, it's a good day for me. First, it's my thirty-first birthday (although, I'm considering counting backwards now and moving back to my twenties).

And second, my revisions for Agent Sara have been given a thumbs up, so I'm going on submission to publishers!  *throws confetti*  *bites nails*  *takes shot of tequila*  Okay, not really on that last one.  Tequila in the morning is not advisable.  *swigs orange juice*

Therefore, I figured a celebration is in order. And what better way to celebrate a birthday then to give presents!

So, here's what's up for grabs:

A brand spanking new copy of Wicked Becomes You by Meredith Duran

Here's the blurb (from Amazon): 

She’s been burned not once but twice by London’s so-call ed gentlemen . . .Gwen Maudsley is pretty enough to be popular, and plenty wealthy, too. But what she’s best known and loved for is being so very, very nice. When a cad jilts her at the altar—again—the scandal has her outraged friends calling for blood. Only Gwen has a different plan. If nice no longer works for her, then it’s time to learn to be naughty. Happily, she knows the perfect tutor—Alexander Ramsey, her late brother’s best friend and a notorious rogue.So why won’t a confirmed scoundrel let her be as bad as she wants to be?Unbeknownst to Gwen, Alex’s aloof demeanor veils his deepest unspoken desire. He has no wish to see her change, nor to tempt himself with her presence when his own secrets make any future between them impossible. But on a wild romp from Paris to the Riviera, their friendship gives way to something hotter, darker, and altogether more dangerous. With Alex’s past and Gwen’s newly unleashed wildness on a collision course, Gwen must convince Alex that his wickedest intentions are exactly what she needs.

Now, even if you're not one to read historical romances, how can you resist that blurb?

And the other prize available is:

A 5 pg. or query critique from little ol' me.

Two winners will be selected. First place will get their choice of the two prizes. Second place will get the remaining prize.

So what do you need to do to enter?

Just leave a comment with your email address below.  ONLY those who leave email addresses will be eligible for the prizes.  Entries will be accepted through this Sunday and winners will be announced next Monday.

*Book prize only available to those living in US and Canada.

Hope everyone has a great day!

**Today's Theme Song**

"Song 2" - Blur (the woo-hoo song)

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

Bom Chicka Wah Wah: Types of Love Scenes

Photo via The U.S. National Archives

I promised on Wednesday that I'd post about heat levels in love/sex scenes and how to decide which level to go with for your book. This is an updated post from earlier in the year.

This information was pulled from two classes I attended at the DFW Writer's Conference on writing sex scenes--one by author Jenni Holbrook and the other by author Shayla Black.  (Great conference btw, if you're looking for a conference to go to DFWCon is coming up in February and is going to be huge. I think there are like 10-12 agents already confirmed to be there for pitches, plus the workshops are always great.)

Now on to the sex (or not as the case may be)! As most of you have figured out, I write and read sexy and erotic romance, so love scenes are an integral part of my stories.  Now, I know many of you may cringe at the idea of writing sex on the page and think this isn't for you.   But even if you're writing clean cut YA, you should know what the components are because a simple kiss IS a love scene if done correctly.

First, let's get the main rule out of the way:

DO NOT put in a love scene unless it changes the character(s) and moves things (usually internal conflict) forward.  Just like any other scene, it must serve a purpose.

Okay, now let's identify the types of love scenes (care of Jenni Holbrook):

1. Closed Door/Fade to Black

--This is where the sex is implied, but not shown.

Use this:

--When the change in the characters does not happen during the actual act.

--Think of old movies where they kiss and then the camera pans to bedroom curtains fluttering in the breeze.

2. Glossed Over Sex

--This is where a little more is shown--maybe a little touching and buildup, but then that door slams shut.

Use this:

--When the change in the character happens during the intimate moments leading up to the actual bom-chick-wah-wah.

--Ex.) Dirty Dancing (one of the hottest scenes EVAH), when Baby and Johnny dance in his room.  (YouTube won't let me embed the video, but here's the link, if you'd like your daily swoon.) They take off shirts and touch and kiss while dancing, but that is where the change happens--when she says "dance with me" and he accepts the invitation.  Then we see them in bed, kissing, and the scene fades.

3. Full Sex Scene

--This is what you'll see in many mainstream romances and other genre fiction.  The sex happens on the page, door open.

Use this:

--When the change in the characters or revelations about the characters happen during the actual sex.

--Ex.) The Sookie Stackhouse/True Blood books.

4.  Explicit Sex Scene

--This is most often used in erotic romance and erotica.  A full sex scene, like above, but everything is described and the language used is no holds barred.  (Yes, you know what words I'm talking about.)

--FYI: the difference between erotic romance and erotica is that e. romance has a primary relationship and there is a happily ever after.  Erotica is more about sexual exploration, doesn't necessarily need to be relationship based, and doesn't require HEA.

Use this:

--Just like a full sex scene, the character change happens during the act.

--If you are using kinky sex acts

--This is not for the faint of heart.  Make sure you read lots of erotic romance to get a feel for exactly what explicit means, lol.

So, how do you decide which level to write at?

1.  Comfort level has to be there.

--If the idea of writing a sex scene makes you squeamish or if you are one of those people who (*gasp*) skips past the love scenes in books, you're probably going to want to fade to black or gloss over.

--The reader will be able to tell if you were uncomfortable about writing it.

--If you think you want to write sex, then make sure you read widely in your particular genre to get a feel for what works and where those lines are. 

--And as I mentioned in the comments on Wednesday, I think it's helpful to read one level of heat above what you're planning on writing. So if you want to write sexy, read erotic. It will help you get more comfortable about what you're going to write, desensitize you a bit to the embarrassment factor.

2.  What does your character/story need?

--According to Shayla Black, if you can pluck out a sex scene and it won't change your character's arc or transformation, then you probably didn't need the scene in the first place.  Do not put it there just to have one (see main rule above).

3.  Know your audience

--You have to know what you are writing and who you are writing for.

--If you put a full sex scene in an inspirational romance, your readers would be appalled.  If you're writing erotic romance and you fade to black, your readers will want to string you up by your toes and beat you with your book.  :)

--And if you're writing YA, you have even more of a challenge.  Figure out if you're writing edgy or traditional and how far your want to push.

And one last Public Service Announcement since this came up in Wednesday's comments:

Even though it's hard, try not to let the "my mother/grandmother/father will read this" factor hold you back. I get it. I've had the same thoughts about what I'm writing BUT here's the thing--will you keep yourself from writing the story you want to write, a story that could entertain thousands of readers because of ONE or two people in your life?  If you're not comfortable writing love scenes because you personally aren't cool with it or it's not your thing. That's fine--you shouldn't do it if that's how you feel. However, if you like to read/write sexy but are stopping yourself because of what others think, then you're letting other people dictate your passion. Don't give others that much power over you.  (Just my humble opinion. Take it for what it's worth.)  

Alright, so I hope this helps.  Writing love scenes is one of the most challenging things to get right.  If you want to know more, I also have posts on sexual tension and writing sex scenes you can check out.

So, where do you fall on the levels in your story?  And are you a person who loves to peek past that door or do you skip those scenes?  (For the record, I'm fascinated by you scene skippers.  How do you do that and why? lol)

 

 

Love Scenes 101: Don't Be Corny or Porn-y

Photo by Boris SV

I'm the final stretch of another round of edits, so today I'm bringing you an (updated) post I did about a year ago on love scenes. Hope you enjoy!

So what exactly constitutes a love scene? Are they only important for those of us writing romance? Of course not. 

A love scene can involve any number of things. It could be that kiss that your readers have been rooting for since page three or it can be full out swinging from the chandeliers romp (I'll talk more about how to choose the level of heat on Friday). But regardless of the type you're writing, it can make or break a story. Nothing will make me put a book down faster than a cheesy or non-emotionally engaging love scene. 

So let's look at what can cause a lackluster scene and then what you can do to make it sparkle so that your readers remember that moment long after putting down the book. 

What can turn a hot moment cold?

You're squeamish

If you, the author, are not comfortable with the scene, your readers will be able to tell. Do not write an erotic romance if the thought of typing out four-letter words in a sex scene makes you cringe.

Shallow POV

The reader needs to feel like she is in the moment with the characters. So make sure you use Deep POV effectively and don't pull out of that.

Lack of character development

If your characters are flat, their love scene will be as well. We need to be invested in the characters.

You haven't established sufficient motivation for the scene.

Don't have them kiss/jump in bed/etc. just because it feels like a good time. Make sure we know why they are doing this now. That doesn't mean that things can't happen fast. Many romances have a love scene very early, but you have to establish the WHY and get us connected to the characters before that moment happens.

You haven't raised the stakes enough.

The risk of them getting together is nil and therefore uninteresting. What consequences could happen now that they are giving in to their love/desire for each other?

No change happens.

Love scenes should change the people involved--be that good or bad.

The scene lacks emotion.

All we have is description of the physical acts and not what's going on in their heads and hearts. This can turn a great sensual scene into gratuitous (and boring) porn. *yawn*

So what are some ways to make sure your love scene gets readers' hearts racing?

Make sure you've sufficiently built up tension.

This is beyond VITAL. Without tension build up, a love scene won't mean anything. See this post.

Write in emotions.

Tell us what's running through your character's mind. Often the emotions in this type of scene will be mixed, but let the reader know what's going on. THIS is the whole point of the love scene--how it affects the characters.

Love scenes should be tailor-made

You should not be able to cut and paste a love scene and drop into a different story. Only these two characters could have this exact scene.

Conflict should still be present.

If both love each other, have no obstacles, and jump in bed--snore. They have to be risking something. Otherwise, it's just two people doing it.

Use dialogue.

I love using dialogue in a love scene. Teasing words can be great for tension. Dirty talk (a personal favorite of my hero in Exposure Therapy) can be fun because often it's pushing the other character out of their comfort zone.

A sense of humor can come in handy

Love scenes don't have to be totally serious. Kissing or getting naked with someone can be awkward and a little humor and sarcasm can help ease nerves and bring the characters closer together. I find playful sarcasm sneaking into most of my love scenes. It's okay for them to laugh, too.

Write what you feel comfortable with and what is right for the characters.

Love scenes don't have to be fully described (although they can be). You can shut the door and fade to black. It can be a simple kiss. You have to be comfy with the amount you're letting your reader see. And make sure it's appropriate for your character. If you're character is a virgin, don't write a scene where she acts like a pro.

Don't fear the naughty. If your story calls for a little or a lot of dirty, and you feel comfortable writing that type of scene go for it.

If your hero is a notorious badass and playboy, he's probably going to be a little raunchier in bed. And raunchy doesn't have to mean it's porn. If you put in emotion and have built appropriate tension, even a threesome with all the four letter words used can be engaging and romantic. (Really, I promise.) And stop worrying about if your grandmother is going to read it. You're an adult, get over it. :p 

Remember the POV you're writing in.

If you are in the hero's point of view, remember that guys are going to think in a different way than the woman. He's probably not having flowery thoughts (maybe love thoughts, but not flowery). And he's hopefully not going to refer to his uh, friend, as his love sword in his head, lol. 

Speaking of love swords...

Don't use cheesy euphemisms and purple prose. You don't have to use the clinical or crude terms (although you can depending on what you're writing), but use ones that don't make your readers laugh or roll their eyes.

Make sure it's the right time.

Don't put in a love scene just cause you think you need one. Motivate it properly. And it MUST move the plot forward and change the people involved in some way. Every scene has to have that purpose.

Sources: Writing Erotic Romance and Fiction Factor. Another great source (for the 18 and up crowd) author Stacia Kane's Sex Writing Strumpet series of blogs.

And last bit of advice: if your heart isn't racing while you write the scene, you're doing something wrong. You should be anticipating that scene as much as you want your reader to. The first love scene I wrote for my romance, I was sweating by the end of it, lol.

So do you have any tips on writing these scenes? Do you find them difficult to write? (For me they are hard, but so much fun at the same time.) What's one of your favorite love scenes from a book/movie/tv show? Which author do you think writes the best sexual tension/love scenes?

Stand Up and SPEAK Loudly

I had planned for a different blog post today, but after hearing about what's going on in Missouri regarding Laurie Halse Anderson's novel Speak, I wanted to add my voice to the chorus of people standing up in support of the book.

If you haven't heard what's going on, a professor (!) at Missouri State University wrote an article calling SPEAK soft porn because of two rape scenes and warning parents that it shouldn't be in schools.

Now, I get that our first instinct with kids is to stick our head in the sand and pretend that nothing ugly touches them, but unfortunately, that's not reality. I counseled middle schoolers as a social worker and I can tell you, some of those kids had been through things than I can't even imagine surviving--rape, incest, abuse. I've talked to twelve and thirteen-year olds who were contemplating suicide.

Some kids are faced with heavy, soul-crushing stuff and sometimes they have people to talk to and support around them, but many times they don't.  Or they're scared to tell anyone what's happened to them and how they're feeling. Books like SPEAK offer those kids (and all the others who may feel isolated and alone for any number of other reasons) an outlet. A place where they can explore how someone else handled trauma--with a message of hope that if you reach out, you can make it through. And maybe, just maybe, they might decide to reach out for help too.

So, I can't even tell you how angry it makes me to think someone is trying to take that opportunity away on some unfounded excuse of protecting our kids from the big bad mention of sex. First of all--rape is an act of violence and if this guy found the rape scenes titillating (i.e. porn) then he's got bigger issues.

And second of all, I hate that he's tossing this out as a call to parents. Isn't the definition of good parenting being engaged in your child's life? Yes, SPEAK is a book with heavy issues, but parents don't need to shield their teen from that--they need to be willing to read it too and have an open dialogue with their teen. Maybe that was just the opportunity your child needed to feel comfortable talking to you about something that's bothering them in their life.

So, if you agree that this book shouldn't be banned, you can show your support through a number of ways. (Laurie list suggestions on her website.) And if you want to follow the discussion, there is the Twitter tag #SpeakLoudly

So have you read this book? What are your thoughts on banning this type of novel in schools? If you have an opinion differently from me, feel free to express it in the comments--we're all friends here. :)

**Today's Theme Song**

"I'll Stand By You" - The Pretenders

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

The Longhand Cure with Author Nikki Duncan

 

Today is the last day of our two-week guest blogger extravaganza. I want to thank all of the awesome writers who stopped by. I've learned a lot and everyone out there has too. Thanks to all of you who have left comments and made our guests feel welcome!  :)


Now on to today's lovely guest. I met Nikki Duncan via my local RWA group. (See, this is another plug for why you should get involved with your local writing community, not just the online one. You meet some terrific and talented people.) So Nikki is going to talk to us about what she does to get past some of the challenges of writing. And she's not just talking the talk. Each month at our meetings, we list our number of pages written or edited so that we can celebrate each other's accomplishments, and Nikki is always high on the list with crazy numbers. So, this girl is writing her butt off, people. Let's find out how she does it.  Take it away, Nikki...

Writing Challenges and the Longhand Cure

Q: Is writing hard? How do you get past writer’s block? Do you plot or let the story flow? Where do you find time to write?

A: Yes. It’s not real in my opinion. A little of both depending on the book. I make it.

These are only some of the questions I’m asked on a regular basis and the answers are simple, but oh so complicated. The one that confuses people most is the writer’s block one. No one believes every story just flows freely for us and we never struggle to write. And if anyone makes that claim I think they’re full of...well something.

I’ve found myself more and more lately working old school, with pen and paper. If I hit a wall in whatever I’m writing, I can sometimes find motivation in changing music (or turning it on). Others I have to get away from the computer and work longhand.

Why wouldn’t you work on the computer? It seems it would save you so much time?

It would save time if the words flowed onto the screen, but the computer comes with more distractions—Internet, email, Twitter, Facebook, IMs. All these are necessary tools in my trade, but they also take away from the writing. And at the first sign of trouble in a story, at the first hint of an “I don’t know what happens next” moment, it’s easy to turn to any one of those distractions and not write.

Longhand, grabbing a pen and paper and leaving the room with the computer, stops that. I find a quiet corner in the house or in the backyard on a nice day and just write. On paper, the writing is much rougher. It’s more of a stream of thought flow, and it’s near impossible to go back and fix the little errors, so there are a lot of notes in the margins of things to go back and fix, but it gets the first draft written. And I can toss that pen and paper in my bag when I go to sit in a school’s car line or wait in a doctor’s office for an appointment. I can get a lot of writing done in those five or ten minute bursts of time (making time).

So if you’re trying to write, just starting out or struggling with a story, try taking a pen and paper to a different spot in the house or outside. Just write something, even if it’s not your actual story. Write about a character, everything you know, and keep going until you learn something new. Then see where that new discovery takes you. Surprisingly it will often be an answer to fixing whatever you’re struggling with.

Regardless of your approach to writing, if it’s your dream to write, then write. Don’t give anyone or anything the power to stand in your way.

Heart stopping puppy chases, childhood melodrama and the aborted hangings of innocent toys are all in a day’s work for Nikki Duncan. This athletic equestrian turned reluctant homemaker turned daring author, is drawn to the siren song of a fresh storyline.
Nikki plots murder and mayhem over breakfast, scandalous exposes at lunch and the sensual turn of phrase after dinner. Nevertheless, it is the pleasurable excitement and anticipation of unraveling her character’s motivation that drives her to write long past the witching hour.

The only anxiety and apprehension haunting this author comes from pondering the mysterious outcome of her latest twist.
Her debut book SOUNDS TO DIE BY is now available in print, and is the first book in the Sensory Ops series. Read more about SOUNDS TO DIE BY here.
 The second book in her Sensory Ops Series, SCENT OF PERSUASION, is now available in eBook and will release April 5, 2011 in print. Read more about SCENT OF PERSUASION here.

So what tricks do you you have for when you feel yourself getting stuck? Anyone else find longhand writing effective?

**Today's Theme Song (Author's Choice)**

"Kick Some Ass" - Stroke 9

(and instead of playing it in the sidebar, Nikki has given us the fun video for her chosen song!)

Peeking Inside a Successful Crit Partnership

Today I'm bringing you another person I had the pleasure of meeting at RWA Nationals--Jami Gold. She and her crit partner Murphy (who you met last week) have a great relationship and really are like a comedy team when you talk to the two of them together. So I thought it'd be fun to see how two people who seem like complete opposites have developed such a terrific critique partnership. Take it away Jami...

A Peek Inside a Successful Critique Partnership

Thanks, Roni, for inviting me here!  As Roni mentioned in last Thursday’s post, we first met at the RWA Conference when my critique partner, Murphy, and I shared dinner with her.  I’m sure we made quite the impression, as we’re a bit like Mutt & Jeff.  I’m dark-haired and tall, while Murphy is blonde and…not so much.  We’re opposites in many ways.  Just look at our websites, could they be any more different?

My Website

Murphy’s Website

Despite our differences, we have a great critique partnership -- and friendship.  Like other relationships, sometimes the differences will make you stronger, especially if you have the important stuff in common.  So many people have been impressed by our partnership that I thought it’d be fun to explore what makes it work.

Murphy, I know you’re just dying to tell the world what makes me so awesome, so we’ll start off with that question first.  What’s your favorite thing about working with me?

Murphy:  You mean, besides how good you are at planning?  Prime example?  This post.  Yup, don’t think I didn’t notice what you did here. Sheesh!  Cleverly manipulating the situation so it turns your post into an interactive extravaganza where I’m doing half the work!  Kidding -- well, not really.  *grumble*

My favorite THINGS, because there are more than one.  The truth?  You’re freakishly smart, honest, loyal, and you have a genuine desire to help me be a better writer…which is a good thing, because one of us has to be paying attention, right? :)

Yeah, I wasn’t going to bring up your outright refusal to learn how to use commas, but since you did…  *innocent whistle* 

No, I think you hit the nail on the head.  The number one thing that makes us successful is that we’re both truly pulling for each other.  We could be the type of critique partners who give feedback and leave it at that.  But we both have (and here’s one of those important things we have in common) the same drive and determination to make it in this industry.  Accordingly, we respect each other for that -- and we push each other to reach that goal.

And this brings me to my second question:  Murphy, how would you compare our style of editing?

Excellent question. *insert me rubbing my hands together with an evil laugh here*

I have a graduated scale I use.  It’s all very technical, mathematically calculated and vertically calibrated, but I’ll share it with you, even though I haven’t patented it yet.  Should I say patent pending here or something? 

No?  Okay, my comments on your work are brief and relative to the size of the edit.  The list stacks up like this:

Nope. -- That’s for something that just doesn’t sound right.

Um, no. -- That’s for something that isn’t right.

Hell, no. -- That’s something that’s a combination of the above two.

HELL NO! -- Is for something I wouldn’t even have the nerve to put on paper, and reading whatever-it-was made me do a double take.

WTF? -- Is for those special times when Jami has done a hack ‘n’ slash and neglected to get all of the paragraph deleted.  Trust me, there’s been some classic WTF’s.

So, that’s my scale and when there are two or more of these comments in a paragraph?  It’s example time.

Oh, yes, the classic example time.  These are where I usually think, “But I’d never write anything like that,” before tilting my head and reading the example cross-eyed to see if that helps.  Eventually, I figure out some nugget of useful information to incorporate into my work.  Moral of the story:  Even if you sometimes don’t agree with the suggested changes, see if you can figure out why the section felt “off” to the feedback reader and fix it.

Hello?  I think I was talking.

Er, what?  Oh, sorry, please continue…

Your approach?  It’s more subtle.  Yes, that thick red line that goes clear across my cleverly constructed monstrosities doesn’t have a break, a tremor, or a hesitant point anywhere.  Hmm…almost like you’re enjoying what you do.  And you punctuate those FREQUENT strikes with…  Oh, let’s see?  PPP, fragment, or my best buddy ever, dangling modifier.  You do put a smiley face next to them, to ease the burn, I suppose, but I usually just stick my tongue at him and start looking for the vodka. 

Hey, once you gave me a gold star.  It’s true.  And right next to that, you said:  “Good for you, Murphy, you managed to get two PPP’s and a dangling modifier into that short paragraph.  Now, that’s talent!”  I thought so, but after I reread the sucker, I was amazed you didn’t find a partridge in a pear tree in there somewhere -- geez, it had everything else.  :)

Yes, it’s true.  I do enjoy killing words.  Bwhahahaha!  *ahem*  But really, can you blame me?  When one of your sentences has 7 -- count them: 7 -- adjectives and adverbs, I wouldn’t be a good critique partner unless I made you pick 2 and get rid of the rest.  What I haven’t told you is that I’m slowly weaning you down to just one modifier…  Per.  Page.  *evil grin*

I hope you’re all taking notes here.  Do you see any sugar-coating?  Nope.  And that’s another reason we’re successful.  We both know that no matter how soul-rippingly brutal our critiques get, we’re doing it because we want the other one to succeed.  It’s like ‘tough love’.  The “HELL NO!” or sea of red marks might sting for a minute or two (or more), but we know the other person just wants what’s best for us.  That trust helps us take the criticism, to be sure, but it also helps us give honest feedback in return, because we know that if we gloss over problems, we’ll hurt the other one more in the long run by not pushing them improve.

And that brings me to the next question, which is about how to make sure you’re both getting something out of a partnership.  The differences between us ensure that we’re not critiquing in an echo chamber.  Our disparate approaches to wordsmithing, grammar, character development, pacing, plotting vs. pantsing, etc., all mean that we have real value to offer to the other one.  So, Murphy, what do you think is the key for us balancing each other’s needs?

WELL, since you asked, I’d say it was a freaking stroke of luck that we found each other.  I mean, where else could I have found a person who, like myself, wants things done well AND wants them done yesterday!  All kidding aside, I respect your work ethic and your drive.

Again, we’re a good mix.  We don’t over-think anything together, because when we swap thoughts, it’s interesting and inspiring precisely because we think differently.  I love that best of all.  I mean, how boring would it be if I agreed with everything you wrote and vice-versa?  Ick! We’d never grow.  And I’m growing, baby!  And so are you!  What’s my favorite saying?  You learn more from your weaknesses that your strengths.  Hey, it’s true…unless one of them happens to be comma placement.  I’m serious.  Who got to decide where those little critters go?  I want their number.  I’m making crank calls. :)

Hey, don’t blame me.  I’m just the messenger.  I’ve already resigned myself to fixing your commas for the rest of eternity.  But those fluffy modifiers of yours?  And those abundant verbs?

What?  You don’t like my spiffy, spectacular and sparkling prose that leaps off the page at you?  Especially when I top it all off with some clever, yet subtle, alliteration?

Yeah, those?  Those I’m working on.

So there you have it, folks: a peek inside one of the most brutal, yet loving, critique partnerships.  But know that we weren’t like this from the get-go.  Nope, just like every other relationship, we had to find what worked for us.

If you’re searching for a critique partner(s), keep in mind these things:

• ·         Similar drive, determination, and work ethic;
• ·         Similar comfort level with giving/receiving criticism;
• ·         Dissimilar strengths and weaknesses (so you each have something different to offer);
• ·         Straightforward communication for time commitments and limitations (set expectations for what you do and don’t have time to do);
• ·         And finally, it’s a nice bonus to have the potential for mutual respect, honesty, and trust down the road -- as these all help with that willingness to give and receive the brutal criticism that will push you to the next level in your writing.

With the right critique partner, you can find someone who will not only help you with your writing, but who will also become one of your biggest cheerleaders.  And on those beyond-hard days, it’s nice to have someone willing to talk you down from the ledge.

What kind of critique partner/group do you have?  If you don’t have a partnership like this, which ingredients are you missing?  Does this post give you some ideas about how to get your partnership to that level?  If you do have a great partnership, what are the keys to your success?

Jami (with many thanks to Murphy!)

**Also, as a sidenote, my former crit group is looking to fill my spot. Details over at Lynnette Labelle's blog.

**Today's Theme Song**

"You've Got a Friend In Me" - Randy Newman

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

WIP Wednesday with Author Angi Morgan

Today I have the pleasure of introducing you to debut author Angi Morgan. I first met Angi when I joined my local RWA group, and I have enjoyed watching her career take off this past year. Not only did Angi make her first sale (quickly followed by her second!) but she also won the coveted Golden Heart award with this manuscript at RWA Nationals! For those of you who aren't familiar, the Golden Heart is like the romance world's Oscar for unpublished manuscripts (which this story was at the time of the contest.) 

So, even if you aren't someone who usually reads the shorter romances/Harlequins (And why not? They're awesome), I think you should check out this book. We can all learn something from a story that not only gave a new author her first sale, but has risen to the top to snag such an important award. So, check out the blurb and then I'll hand it over to Angi.

Blurb:

Dr. Jane Palmer had every intention of telling FBI agent Steve Woods he was a father. But the rehearsed lines and practiced responses were forgotten the moment her little boy was kidnapped. Now, heart breaking and on the verge of falling apart, Jane needed Steve more than ever….

After every attempt at putting old feelings to rest, Steve Woods never expected Jane back in his life. Especially not for this reason. Racing against a ticking clock, desperate to earn Jane's trust, Steve still sensed Jane wasn't telling him everything. Which made him wonder why she'd come to Texas in the first place. And what it had to do with the child he'd do anything to rescue.

WIP Wednesday

Thank you for inviting me today, Roni. This is an exciting week. HILL COUNTRY HOLDUP, my first Harlequin Intrigue is on sale. Seeing the actual book sitting on a shelf was the most awesome feeling. I have lots of contests this week and will list them at the end. So I thought I’d keep with your WIP Wednesdays theme since I’m at the beginning of a new manuscript.

It’s actually been a while since I began a completely new concept. Since I’ve been trying to sell for several years, I spent more time on re-working good stories instead of developing new ideas. So working completely from scratch is quite refreshing.

I submitted my second Intrigue (.38 Caliber Cover-Up) the second week of August and waited a couple of weeks before writing my notes. By then, back-to-school sales called to me (I’m a sucker for office supplies). A new type of notebook with lots of pockets caught my eye and I wondered how I could use it for writing. I made poster board cards to fit, and stuck the post it notes I wrote about my characters or scenes. The small poster pulls out and I can review more closely. And the post its allow me to rearrange, etc. It’s nice for travel, and for being poolside. I use my Netbook for notes, but sometimes having pen and paper (or a post it) is very useful. The post its also transfer directly to my story board so I have the notes while I’m working in my office for those times I’m just staring into space.

But back to getting started on a manuscript...

I’m letting a lot of the story gel in my head while I promote HCH this week. I’m a definite pantzer--not plotting many of details. I make notes about events I know for certain will happen, and post its for things I know are absolutes about the characters.  

I gather pictures of scenery and make a story collage with pictures from magazines. I also find pictures that represent the hero and heroine for me and make the guy my computer backdrop. So each time the computer fires up (desktop or laptop), I see the face of the hero. It not only reminds me why I selected that particular picture, but also reminds me to write.

One other thing I’ve discovered. I was determined to call this WIP Intrigue # 3, so I wouldn’t get a title into my head that would change if Harlequin bought the book. Well...turns out I just can’t wrap my brain or Muse around it. I’m hoping to write every day on Showdown in San Antonio.

Thanks for having me today.

~~Angi

QUESTIONS FOR YOU: Are you more excited beginning a manuscript or finishing? Be honest. And what are some of the things you do when gathering ideas for a new WIP?

CONTESTS: The details for my contests are on my website: AngiMorgan.com. Hold Up the Cover will run the entire month HCH is on bookshelves--I have several prizes to be drawn for those sending me a picture of themselves with the cover (and signing up for my newsletter). And there’s one more contest for debut week: I’m blog hopping (list on website) and if you leave five comments on five blogs this week (13th through 19th), then send me an email, you’ll be entered in a drawing for more books and prizes. (You can even go back to blogs from 9-13 and 9-14.)

Visit her website AngiMorgan.com or become a friend on Facebook. And go check out her book!

**Today's Theme Song**

"Somewhere Down in Texas" - George Strait

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

Deal Breakers: Do You Know What Yours Are?

So, guest bloggers will continue tomorrow (haven't they been so fab?), but I thought I'd pop in today and say hi. I'm excited to report that I've finished this round of major rewrites/revisions for Agent Sara! *dances around in a circle* Now it's in her hands. Hopefully she likes the changes--if not, then back to the trenches I go. But for now, I'll hope for the best. :D

Now, what I thought I'd talk about today is this whole idea of rewrites. I know all of us understand that our work will need editing and revision once an agent or publisher takes us on. No matter how perfect we think we've gotten it, there is only so much we can do without a professional, unbiased eye.

That's good news and bad news.

The good news is that as long as your story has strong writing, a great concept, and marketability (piece of cake, right?) then an agent or publisher won't let a few things that need reworking stand in the way of taking you on.

The bad news? You're going to be faced with the issue of what you are and are not willing to change in your book. How emotionally attached are you to your words, characters, concept, etc.?

Before Sara offered me representation, she emailed me a long list of editorial notes about pretty major things she would like me to change. She did this to make sure that before she offered to rep me, that we had the same vision. I really appreciated this heads up because it put the ball in my court--were these things I was willing to change?

I read through the feedback and let it sink in overnight. My initial reaction? I was daunted by the amount of work that would be involved with those changes. It made me wonder if I was capable of changing all those things while still making the rest of the story work. So basically a little wave of maybe-I'm-not-good-enough panic.

Then, as it settled in, I realized--wow, these things will make the book so much stronger and deeper. I would love to be able to reach that level with this story. So, obviously, I agreed to the changes and then went through a whirlwind three weeks of fixing all of it (hopefully successfully.) In the end, I had to cut about 20k words, and no--that's not because I like words and had overwritten--no, I was right at my word count, so I had to cut those 20k and then replace them with completely new stuff. That writing new stuff was fun, but definitely the most difficult part because changing one thing in one part of the book has a domino effect on everything else.

But anyway, here's what it got me to thinking about (and discussing with Sierra Godfrey)--do you have deal breakers? Changes that, if asked, you wouldn't be willing to do. And if you have those things, would you be able to possibly turn down an agent/publisher because your visions didn't align?

For instance, what if Sara had asked me to nix my happy ending and go in the erotica direction instead of erotic romance?  That is something I wouldn't want to compromise because I'm at heart, a romantic. I want to write books with happy endings. It's who I am. And as you know, once you start publishing in one genre, it's not always easy to jump into something else--so you better like what you're writing from the start.

Thankfully, Sara's and my vision aligned and none of the changes she asked for changed the essence of what I wanted my story to be and in fact, made me like my story better. But it's definitely something to keep in mind when you're on the search for an agent/publisher.

Now, it's important not to have a laundry list of deal breakers. After all, this business is about collaborative effort. We aren't the be all end all as the author. However, I also think it's vital to know what you are just not willing to compromise.

So, I'm curious, do you have any deal breakers? Would you consider turning down an offer if someone asked you to change something that just didn't feel right for you or your career?

**Today's Theme Song**
"If I Can't Have You" - Kelly Clarkson

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

Pitch It! Pitch It Good!

This week we're continuing with the parade of awesome guest bloggers. Today, I have the pleasure of introducing you to author Heather Long. She and I "met" as bloggers first (she has a terrific blog right over here), and then found out we were in the same local RWA group. :) Heather also attended RWA nationals and she had a great experience pitching in person.

I am such a huge chicken about in-person pitching that I could sprout feathers just thinking about it, so this is a topic I thought best covered by someone who has had the guts to actually do it. So Heather, take it away...

Pitch it!  Pitch it Good!

Good morning and thank you Roni for allowing me this opportunity to drop by and chat!  Pitching is never fun. For some people, pitching means a racing heartbeat, sweaty palms and the fear that their breath will smell of coffee, garlic and onions even if they haven’t been near any of those items.  For others, pitching isn’t something to sweat or worry about. You just show up, say your piece and go home. You probably aren’t going to get anywhere with the pitch session, but you say you’re doing it so others will consider you as serious about your craft as they are about theirs.

Well, honestly – while I have found attitudes that cover all ranges of the above, the truth is – a good pitch session can really change the direction of your career. It can also be the litmus test for how serious you are and how much you think of your own work.

Professional Litmus Test

Pitching takes practice. I’ve walked into pitch sessions and gibbered like a gibbon before. I’m not proud of it. But it’s happened.  For example, not all that long ago, I went to a writer’s conference where we spent the majority of the day in a workshop. It was a terrific workshop. I learned so much that I thought my head would split open from the details.

But when it came time to pitch, just after lunch, I realized that the story I was pitching was crap.  And yes, that’s exactly how the thought occurred to me. I said, “This is crap. Total crap. I could make it so much better.”  I walked into that pitch session without an ounce of confidence about my own work because the workshop showed me so many ways I could be better.

The agent listened with half an ear, a faintly bemused smile on her face and I could tell that my half-halting descriptions flavored by my own disbelief weren’t selling her on the story anymore than I was.  I walked out of the pitch session feeling like an idiot.

Why had I even bothered?

Don’t Stop Believing

I bothered because I had a good story idea.  I bothered because I had great characters.  I bothered because before that workshop, I really believed in that story.  The problem was, I learned so much that I began to over think the process. Sure that story could be improved, but the heart of it – the meat of the story – that remains essentially the same.

By failing to believe in myself, I failed that pitch. I also ended up shoving the book on the backburner where it sits to this day. I’ve added back into my rotation as a book I will tackle after Christmas. But that’s a tale for another day.

Now that’s the bad side of pitching. The side everyone has experienced at one point in time or another. It’s a miserable feeling, but shake it off. Because good pitches do happen and I want to tell you how you can make it happen for you.

I Do Believe in My Story, I Do! I Do!

Do you remember the Peter Pan movie from a few years ago: the scene where Peter is trying to save Tink and everyone in the film begins chanting “I do believe in fairies! I do! I do!” – this is what you need to remember when it comes to pitching.  In July, I was attending the RWA National Conference in Orlando, Florida. I wasn’t going to pitch because all the sessions with editors and agents were taken in May while I was on a road trip.

Several people encouraged me to go for the walk in, because so many weren’t showing up for their pitch sessions.  I hesitated, because while I had finished a book and I really liked it, I hadn’t “prepared” for pitching.

Saturday morning, I woke up early and decided that after looking at the workshop schedule and not seeing one I absolutely had to get to, that maybe I’d go take a look at the pitch room. I walked in, I talked to the registration folks and I said, I wanted to sign up to wait – when they asked me who I wanted to see, I said anyone would be fine.

I lucked out. One of the Harlequin editors had some cancellations, so I was able to book a very specific time.  I thanked the registrar, darted out of the hall and back up to my room. I changed into a smart skirt, a fun shirt and dressed up my smile with a touch of makeup and then darted back downstairs.

I had just a few minutes before it would be my turn.  I waited patiently as we lined up and when they called time, I walked down to where the editor was waiting. 

Here it was, the crucial moment – would I bomb it? Would I stutter? Would I forget everything I’d written?

I held out my hand, introduced myself and grinned.  My nerves weren’t there.  Maybe it was the combination of a great conference experience where I was meeting new people every hour, discussing writing, love for books, romance and sharing those experiences with other writers who “got it.”  Maybe it was Nora Roberts’ terrifically inspiring bullsh*t keynote address about how hard it was to break into the business 30 years ago and that sweating for the job was part of it.  Maybe it was Jayne Ann Krentz’ highly anecdotal and hilarious tale of blowing up her own career because she wanted to tell her stories her way.

Who knows how much all of that contributed to my sense of inner calm, but I knew that I believed in my book. I loved the story that I told. I loved the characters. I loved the fun, sexy, twisty humor and I loved the fact that it was so utterly different from anything I’d ever written before.

So I pitched it.   Can I remember the words I used, exactly? Nope. But I do know it was conversational, I said “Imagine this…” and I told her what my hero and heroine were doing when they met, how they were drawn together and why they needed each other. I described the misunderstandings and added the element of suspense.  The more I warmed to the topic, the more engaged the editor became.

She asked me two questions.

I answered them without hesitation because I knew how I’d handled it in the book and then she smiled.

She smiled and said it sounded like a great story and that it gave her chills.  I think my heart started playing a drum line in my ears then, but she told me to send in the partial, the synopsis and the query, to pitch it exactly as I hard to her and to mention that she’d told me to do it in the letter.

I thanked her.  Said I would get right on it when I went home and I floated out of the hall.

I wasn’t floating just because she asked for the partial (but that was part of it), I wasn’t floating just because I hadn’t managed to flub the pitch (but that was part of it too), and I was floating because my faith in this story was there. I was confident in it even after all the workshops and all the great writers I met.  I didn’t feel small. I didn’t feel like I had to rewrite it.

Do I think it will need editing? Absolutely.

Am I confident that it will sell? Yes.

Am I happy that I pitched?  Hell yes.

Believe in yourself. Believe in yourself to share your story with the editors and agents out there that want to hear it.  If you are engaged by the book you wrote, by the story you told, then you can bring that level of investment to the editors and agents.

Don’t stop believing and you’ll find them believing right alongside you.

Have you ever pitched a story in person? What was your experience like? If not, what's holding you back from doing so?

About Heather

Heather Long lives in North Texas with her husband, daughter and their menagerie of animals. As a child, Heather skipped picture books and enjoyed the Harlequin romance novels by Penny Jordan and Nora Roberts that her grandmother read to her. Heather believes that laughter is as important to life as breathing and that the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus are very real. In the meanwhile, she is hard at work on her next novel.

Contact Info:

Website: http://www.heatherlong.net

Blog: http://dailydose-fantasyromance.blogspot.com

Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/HVLong

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/HVLong

**Today's Theme Song**

"Hey Man, Nice Shot" - Filter

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

Creating an Authentic Teen Guy's Voice

 

How can we top off a week of fabulous guest bloggers? Well, duh, invite my friend and soon-to-be debut YA author Julie Cross to hang with us.

Julie and I met in bloggy land early on, and I've had privilege of both beta-ing some of her work and having her beta mine. And let me tell you--this girl knows voice. No matter what story excerpt I read of hers, that's the thing that came shining through in every piece. I'm half-convinced she's not a fellow mom like me and is secretly a high school student. :) 

So, I hope you'll take the time to absorb this terrific post and if you're not already doing so--go follow her blog. She's going to be the next big thing, people, with her debut YA time travel novel Tempest coming out next year.

CREATING AN AUTHENTIC TEEN GUY’S VOICE

First of all, I just want to come right out and admit a couple things:

1)      Roni’s blog totally rocks and I’m totally nervous to be guest blogging today. I’ve got butterflies just thinking about all the amazing people who might read this post.

2)      Until very recently, I completely stunk at writing real teen boys. My guy characters were basically girls in cute boy bodies. Seriously. I’m so not kidding.

Okay, on to the real information

MY CREDENTIALS

**feel free to skim this if you want to get on to the information, I felt obligated to establish credibility so you all weren’t like, “Who the freak is this lady and why is she telling me what to do?”

In the past year, I’ve written 7 young adult novels (5 girl MC’s and 2 boys). All of them are written in first person. All of them have some kind of romantic element and I made the mistake of assuming if I’m writing for a female audience, my guys have to be perfectly caring and sensitive or complete a-holes (which leads to a sensitive girlie-boy, who’s of course totally cute, sweeping in to rescue the girl from the manly a-hole).

When I started creating TEMPEST with my editor Brendan Deneen, we both knew the concept was big enough to reach a larger audience than just teen girls. So, the real challenge was creating a guy that girls enjoyed reading and boys could read without gagging.

Not as easy as it sounds. At first, I didn’t over-think it. I wrote one chapter at a time and just before I’d hit the send button to pass it along to Brendan, I’d chicken out and remove at least half of the sappy, over dramatic crap. That was my only motivation in the beginning.

The second person to read TEMPEST was my agent, Suzie Townsend and the very first thing she said to me in an email and then again on the phone was how much she loved Jackson. And I’m seriously not trying to toot my own horn. I was completely shocked to hear this was what stuck with her most. And it kept on coming from all the readers that followed. I would get words like, “Swoon” and “Major swoon.” This is straight from Suzie’s notes on Draft 2 (and Suzie has a well-deserved reputation for giving kick-ass notes): “I love Jackson from the first time we meet him. He has a great voice, I was rooting for him the whole way through the book – and he is rather swoon-worthy. (ah, sa-woon!)”

Okay, so here I am, ready to write the next draft which required some MAJOR revisions and I’m all full of warm fuzzies because everyone loves my nineteen year-old time-traveling guy.

Great, right?

I get everything ready and start to attack the MS for the next draft and then I get really freaked because I knew Jackson was the favorite, but I hadn’t figured out exactly how I got it right. How I got him right. It was completely on accident (mostly because I hated sending Brendan the mushy-girlie stuff) and now I had to write new scenes and not turn him into something different. Major, major freak session followed along with writer’s block (that I completely denied).

The first thing I realized and was pretty shocked with, was the fact that Jackson is never really described physically and neither is his main love interest. Her height, hair/eye color are noted, but Jackson never comes out and says she's the hottest girl on the planet and every guy wants her (I made that mistake in a very early version—readers don’t like that). Jackson doesn’t have girls falling all over him either. He comes across as fairly polite when compared to an insensitive horn-ball character. He has a few moves, but kinda bombs with them. Readers interpreted him as “swoon worthy,” but I never came out and said he was a Mr. Gap model guy or anything.  

After careful analysis, I figured out a few things about my MC that anyone can apply to help create an authentic teen guy. Even if your audience is mostly female, they still want the guy to seem as close to real as possible with just a hint of something amazing. And I swear you can do this without mentioning the word erection or boner and without sessions of “guy talk” involving embellished (or completely made up) sexual experiences. My guy is nineteen, so a younger guy (13-15) may have more mention of those things in the internal dialogue. If it’s important, don’t skirt around it. My book just happens to have life threatening events on every other page so there’s not much room for mention of every moment of arousal or time spent looking at internet porn. 

** keep in mind, writing a teen boy is SO hard for me. When I work on my character development journals and I get to write from Holly’s POV (my female MC) the words just fly onto the computer like the most natural thing in the world. Don’t expect it to come too easy (unless you’re actually a guy, but grown men sometimes forget what’s it’s like to be a teenager, more so than women). 

  

BOY BASICS

EMOTIONAL PACING (No Crying on page one!!)

n  Where your boy is, emotionally, in the beginning of the book has to escalate enough to show growth and keep him from being a flat character.

n  If you start at 8 and 10 is the goal, you’ve got a problem.

n  With TEMPEST, you know just from the short description, Jackson witnesses his girlfriend’s murder and gets stuck two years in the past. In my very earliest version, Jackson was hopelessly, forever and ever in love from page 1. Which is really sweet, but then what?

n  The new and improved Jackson isn’t an asshole, just less focused, not completely sure why he likes being around Holly, just that he usually does. For him, that’s enough. For her, it isn’t always, which is an awesome conflict you in the first 2 pages.  Here’s a little sample of Jackson’s internal dialogue  in the opening pages during a fight with his girlfriend:

It would have been impossible to insert even one more drop of sarcasm into her voice. And it hit me like a gust of icy air. I ran my fingers through my hair and tried to come up with something decent to say. Or to decide if I should run. Instead, I went for a change in subject.

**If you’re worried about your character coming off as jerk in the beginning, then maybe, instead of saying something mean or insensitive, you can use the technique I used with Jackson and have him either not know what to say or be completely unaware that he’s even said the wrong thing.

This method = imperfect yet likable guy.

TRY PHYSICAL IN PLACE OF VERBAL 

n  And it’s not just kissing, but a physical action that shows the reader his emotional response without having your dude talk about his feeling.

TOTALLY MADE UP EXAMPLE

Guy MC doesn’t get along with his dad. Dad wants him to play football and he wants to join the GLEE club. Kid lets Dad know he wants to quit playing football after practice one day. They have a big argument outside, right in front of their car. Dad finally admits that his dead Grandpa’s dying wish was for his grandson to play in a state championships. Kid stares at Dad for a second, thinks about how Grandpa let him smoke a cigar when he was 10 and told him not to tell his parents, then he gets in the car without another word or complaint.  

                **So, even though no one sobbed or said I love you, a scene like this can carry a TON of emotional weight and works great with pre-teen/teen boy MCs. Even Dad’s confession can be subtle, “It’s the last thing grandpa said to me. ‘Damn, I would have loved to see Joey kick some ass in the state championships.” Seriously, people will cry. Trust me.  

n  But if we ARE talking about love stuff, kissing might be the way to go. Just when you’re about to have your 17 year-old guy give a speech equal to the worlds’ greatest wedding vowels, stop and ask yourself, “Could he just kiss her instead?” The answer is usually yes and your readers will probably LOVE it because it flows naturally rather than some awkward sentimental speech.

WHAT DOES A REAL GUY DO?

n  I know what you’re thinking, if I’m writing a real guy does that mean he has to play sports, sweat a lot, scratch his balls, sniff under his arm pits, drink out of the milk carton, have porn movie marathons. The answer is: NO, he can do essentially anything. Seriously, there are ways around any hobby or characterization.

n  Would you believe me if I told you that my realistically boyish and very likable MC does all of the following things:

1)      Recites poetry in French

2)      Performs a waltz to the song, Come Away With Me

3)       Recites several pages of Dickens

4)      Sits in a famous art museum in his free time to sketch things

5)      Willingly volunteers at a day camp and is very good with kids

**Did any of you roll your eyes? I totally would if I read this list without reading the book. It’s hard to explain the exact technique for achieving this so I’m just going to give you an example. Again, my motivation began with writing something my editor, a guy who loves action/thrillers, wouldn’t put the red lines through. This little mini-scene made it through without a mark. It follows an argument Jackson and his girlfriend Holly have at the beginning of the book. Jackson offers up a “Make-up gift” and Holly makes a request he’s not excited about granting.

 “You’re turning me into a complete freak. Or worse -- a chick.” I made the mistake of turning my head. One glimpse of the tears still drying on her cheeks and I caved. “If you tell anyone, I will kick your little ass. Got it?”

She mimed zipping her lips, then snuggled up to me. “Do you think you can manage a British accent this time?”

I laughed and kissed her forehead. “I’ll try.”

“Okay, on with it.”

I rolled my eyes then took a deep breath. “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. It was the age of wisdom. It was the age of foolishness. . .”

My ninth grade English teacher always made us recite Dickens while standing in front of the class. I hated it. For Holly, I didn’t mind too much, but I’d never tell her that.

“Do you think he did the right thing?” Holly asked after I’d recited the first few pages.

“You mean Sydney? Getting his head chopped off so the woman he loves can be with another man?” I said.

Holly laughed and her lips vibrated against my chest. “Yeah.”

“No, I think he’s a complete moron.” I kissed the corner of her mouth and she grinned at me.

“You’re lying.”

I pulled her closer and kissed her again, ending the discussion that would inevitably lead to spilling out more secrets than I cared to share.

LESS IS ALWAYS MORE WITH BOYS

n  Give us only a little, tiny insight into the guy’s real feelings. This makes your readers crazy for more, which is a really awesome thing. Besides, readers love to read between the lines and interpret a simple moment into something bigger.

n  Like with the fake example from above, the kid could be imagining his Grandpa carrying him in the house after he fell and broke his leg, or when his grandpa told him how much he loved him. But instead, he’s thinking about how cool it was to smoke a cigar like a man. What it tells the reader is, “Joey” and his grandpa shared a special moment that no one else knows about. Everyone will go “Aaaww” when they read that. And it’s about a ten year-old smoking a freakin’ cigar.

n  Think about how powerful those “Almost kiss” scenes can be. It’s hard to pull off a teen guy voice that gets all sappy. But what if your guy, “Almost” says something sappy, but can’t quite go through with it. This especially works well in first person because the reader knows what he almost says and then we just feel sorry for him and we’re swooning at the words that were never actually spoken. It’s enough that he wants to say it. Actually, most of the time is more than enough. Less is better.

I’ll leave you with one more example of how this could work in your favor:

 That was the first time I really wanted to say it… I love you. It would have been perfect, just melting into the moment. Not like some overplayed drama. But my tongue tied up just thinking it, so instead I said, “Did you know you have a freckle on your-”

She put a hand over my mouth. “Yeah, I know.”

So, have you struggled with writing from the male POV?  Which authors have you read that have nailed the guy perspective?

Thanks so much, Julie! And for even more information on how dudes think, I did a post on adult male POV here.

**Today's Theme Song**

"Teenage FBI" - Guided With Voices

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

Finding the Funny in Your Writing

I met today's guest blogger recently at RWA Nationals when Jamie Wesley and I were waiting to get into a restaurant. The place was crowded and they had a table for four available so we invited two other ladies who were waiting to sit with us. Take this as a lesson: when you go to conferences and such--reach out--you never know who you might meet. Murphy and her crit partner Jami (who will be guest posting next week) were so much fun. We had a great lunch and now have two new writerly friends.  

Now a few months ago I did a post asking if you can learn to be funny in your writing. I honestly didn't know if it was something that could be learned, but Margeanne Mitchell (who goes by Murphy) is here to tell us it can be.  So without further adieu, take it away Murphy.

FINDING FUNNY!

  

First off, I’d like to thank Roni for inviting me to hang with you guys today.  She’s awesome, isn’t she?  Not only generous, but gracious as well.  Thanks, Roni!

Hmm..finding funny?  As you can see by the Little Red Devil's picture above, I don't have to look too far to find it - she's usually right there at my feet! :)  But enough about her.

So, what the heck is humor?  


Well, it’s an unlikely pairing of contrasts that reverses the reader's anticipated expectations.  It requires a certain structure and pace, and these things are dependent on one another.  Think of it like this: structure is the building humor resides in, and pace is the speed at which you walk through that building.  If you do it right, you can seamlessly put a clever twist on a commonly held notion.  That’s all there is to being funny.  The reader is surprised in the end. 

Hey, it sounds good, doesn’t it? Easy.  So why can’t a writer, who doesn’t traditionally write funny, make that universal concept -- contrasts vs. expectations -- work for them? 

I believe they can.  I think even if a writer isn't funny in person, she can write a funny scene with the proper tools if she applies herself.  Maybe she won't be able to do it as easily or frequently as someone who has the knack for it, but regardless, she still has an advantage.  She has time on her side to convince the reader that her character or situation is funny. Unlike the stand-up comic or witty individual in a bar, a writer has the opportunity to edit/cut/paste and be critiqued before introducing her version of funny to the world.  Stop and think about that -- it’s pretty powerful, isn’t it?

So, how do you begin to write that funny scene?  


Well, first things first, you need to decide what you want the funny to be.  I tend to write outrageous situations, where it’s not only the situation that gets the laugh, but also the way the characters react to the situation that can make the reader smile.  This way? I figure I’ve got two chances to amuse the reader.  Better than one, right?

My motto?  Start simple: find the reader’s expectation and exploit it.  By exploit, I mean take their expectation and apply unexpected layers to it.  Let's see, in romance, if you have a heroine who’s doing something she shouldn’t be doing, you gotta know the reader is thinking: Uh oh, the hero’s going to catch her.  This is an opportunity, folks. You have the reader anticipating your next move, so use it as your jumping off point toward a funny scene. 

If I were going to write a scene like the one I mentioned above?  Number one.  I’d have the heroine face all kinds of hilarious obstacles.  She’d manage to do what she needed to do, but not without incident.  And number two.  It would be that lingering incident that eventually comes between her, the hero, and her satisfaction with the job she set out to do in the scene.

My scene?  I’d have her do something specific for her hopeful meeting with the hero.  Maybe she has to sneak back to the stables and get the vial of coveted perfume she’s been packing for such an occasion (meeting the hero). It’s his favorite scent and she’s thinking, this will do the trick, as it will separate her from the other women vying for his attention tonight. So, she faces all kinds of difficult, but funny, challenges to retrieve the perfume she figures will cement the deal with her and the hero.  After all, she’s been told that lavender is his favorite scent, and once he gets a whiff of her precious concoction, he’ll no doubt fall on bended knee and propose to her.  That’s why she nearly breaks her neck, ruins her shoes, and thinks she may have swallowed a fly, all to get back to the stables - to her saddle bag with the coveted bottle of heaven.  Hey, in the end, it’ll all be worth it if her lifelong dream to be married to this perfect guy is realized. 

So here she is, successful in her goal.  She has the perfume in hand.  She’s dealt with all manner of obstacles to get it, she hasn’t been caught, and she still looks great despite everything she’s been through.  She uncorks the vial and takes a huge sniff to reassure herself that she’s done the right thing.  Oh yeah.  But then, just as she’s ready to head back to the party (after re-corking her vial), an odor assails her.  And it’s not so much that (she was in a stable, remember), but the noise she hears that has her curious.  She walks to the middle stall and hesitantly opens the gate. This is where she finds the lavender-loving hero rolling around in the hay with a woman.  When the woman realizes they’ve been caught, she gets up and bolts.  She pushes past the heroine so hard that it causes our heroine to fall to one side in the stall.  Stunned, the heroine catches her breath for a second and then sits up.

Scene example (Click full screen to view):

 Untitled  

Okay:

Number one.  Heroine faces all kinds of hilarious obstacles.  She manages to do what she needs to do, but not without incident.  I'd say we accomplished that.

Number two.  The lingering incident is what eventually comes between her, the hero, and her satisfaction with the job she set out to do in the scene.  We definitely accomplished that.  And what does pairing these two things together create?  Irony.

So, the next time you want to try humor, or punch-up an already funny scene, imagine you're the reader.  Ask yourself, what am I expecting?  Then take that answer and look for the opposite.  In our scene, we guessed the reader would assume that after the heroine faced all kinds of messy/hilarious/trying obstacles to get to that vial. She'd be elbow deep, digging through the saddle bags, when the hero stumbled upon her.  


So, that's what we chose to switch up.  We identified that the saddlebag pilfering was a major issue in the reader’s expectation.  Therefore, that became a minor issue in our scene.  We also recognized that the heroine being caught by the hero was something the reader may count on, so why not have her catch him doing something he wasn't supposed to be doing, and hey, while we’re switching things up, why not make the whole reason for her stealing into the stables in the first place end up being a complete bust.  You see?  Layers.  It's all about layers. :D

Do any of you have problems finding the funny?  Making your version of funny shine?  What about other types of techniques that can be used to insert humor? Has anyone found a successful way to write physical comedy?  That's a toughie! I have a couple of theories on that one, but I'd rather hear yours first. :)

Murphy   


Thanks so much Murphy! And everyone remember to stop by her blog (Bad Boys Can Be Fun) and say hi!

**Today's Theme Song**

"Shut Up and Smile" - Bowling for Soup

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

That Sneaky Backstory

Today, I have the privilege of having fellow romance writer Justine Dell with us. If you're not following Justine, go check her out.  She has a fantabulous blog right over here full on insightful and helpful posts. :)

Now, she's going to give us the dirt when it comes to backstory...

First I would like to say thank you to Roni for allowing me the opportunity to do a guest blog while she is away!

Now, let’s talk about dreaded backstory!

My Great and Powerful Beta of Oz gave me the following book for my birthday this past August:

 

If you don’t have this book—get it. It has helped me leaps and bounds in the short month I’ve had it.

In Chapter 23, Donald Maas discusses low tension: burdensome backstory. I know what you’re all thinking, “There’s no backstory in the beginning of my wip. I know this rule.”

I beg to differ. Politely of course ;-) I thought I had this rule down pat, too. I was wrong.

In the first chapter of your book do you have any setup? Are you bringing any “players” to the stage? Do you establish a setting? Set up a situation? I’ll bet the answer is yes.

Take the first part of my first ever finished wip: Broken Ties That Bind. The first scene introduces the heroine, her husband, and showcases the turmoil in their marriage—right before the heroine meets the hero.

Now, I thought this information was important because I wanted to show the heroine is a state of conflict before I dumped her on top of the hero (who adds another conflict to her marriage).

I was wrong. Here’s the exercise Donald tells us to do in order to fix this problem:

1. In the first fifty pages of your novel, find any scene that establishes the setting, brings the players to the stage, sets up a situation, or that is otherwise backstory.
2. Put brackets around the material, or highlight it in your electronic file.
3. Cut and paste this material into chapter fifteen. Yes, chapter fifteen.

He adds this as a follow up:

“Now, look at chapter fifteen. Does the backstory belong there? If not, can it be cut outright? If that is not possible, where is the best place for it to reside after the midpoint of your novel?”

Then he tells us this:

“Authors bog down their beginnings with setup. Why is that? While writing, the opening chapters, the novelist is getting to know his characters. Who are they? How did they get to be that way? The fact is, the author need to know these things, but the reader does not. The reader needs a story to begin.”

So, you know what I did? I did it! And while scary, it worked. Now my novel actually reads differently.

Instead of the reader knowing my heroine is married and in trouble, they wonder why she brushes of the advances of a guy whom she is obviously attracted to. She’s nervous for reasons the readers want to find out about.  It isn’t until later you discover she’s married and then it’s like “whoa” for the reader.

Try it. I’ll bet you’ll end up with something amazing. And remember why Donald wants us to do this:

“If you must include the backstory, place it so that is answers a long-standing question, illuminating some side of a character rather than just setting it up.”

You’ll get your own “whoa” moment. I promise. ;-)

~JD 

So have you caught backstory sneaking into your early chapters? What's your biggest challenge when it comes to backstory?

**Today's Theme Song**

"The Story" - 30 Seconds to Mars

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

Writing Processes: Different Strokes

If you didn't stop by yesterday, well, why not? Sierra did a terrific post on online presence. But anyway, for this week and next I'm having my fabulous writerly buddies provide us with their insights since I am out of pocket.

Today, I have the privilege of introducing you to my fellow romance writer and bestest bud from my local RWA group, Jamie Wesley. She helped me survive my first RWA Nationals this year and (even though she may not realize yet) is now obligated to be my conference BFF from now on. :) 

She's going to talk to us about her writing process. And I think this is a great post because it really shows how everyone has to find their own way on what works for them. Her method is COMPLETELY opposite mine, but just as effective. So I think it's important for us each to realize that despite all the advice out there, you have to find your own way.

So, now I'll hand it over to Jamie...

I want to thank Roni for inviting me to invade her blog today. Funny story - I met her in January at our local RWA chapter meeting. Since this was my first RWA meeting, I was super nervous. However, I made the brilliant decision to sit next to Roni and eventually worked up the courage to introduce myself. Somewhere along the line, I think I asked her if she had a website. She said, “I blog” in a shy, casual way. Being the good Internet stalker that I am, when I went home, I looked up her blog. My mouth dropped open when I discovered she had (at the time) 500 followers. I felt like I was the guy in Notting Hill who doesn’t recognize the movie star Julia Roberts plays. 

Anyway…

Recently, I completed the first draft of my second manuscript and thought I’d talk about my writing process and get everyone’s thoughts on it. Now, I’m sure we’ve all heard about the pros and cons of being a plotter or a pantser. Though I fall closer to the pantser line, that’s not what I want to discuss. Instead, I want to focus on my method when I plant my butt in the chair or, more likely, my bed, with my computer.

By the time I get to the point where I’m ready to write, I’ve thought of a story idea and have a grasp on the main characters’ backstories and motivations. I have about five scenes in my head begging to be put on paper. These scenes assure me that I do have a workable, sustainable idea. I open a Word document and I’m off and running.

As I write, I follow two basic credos.

I don’t edit as I write.

I can’t write and edit at the same time. Well, I suppose I could, but I believe it would adversely affect my pace. I write rough. In the first draft, I’m more interested in getting the action and any witty dialogue that pops into my head down. I don’t worry about whether or not the prose sounds pretty because 1. It doesn’t and 2. I know I can fix it later.

Pros

-          I don’t get distracted with edits. I would spend the rest of my life making sure chapter one was perfect if I let myself.

-          The story is always fresh in my mind. I’m constantly moving forward and making progress.

Con

-          I have A LOT to fix in the revising/editing stage. If I edited as I went along, I’d have a much cleaner first draft.

I write scenes as they come to me.

I don’t force myself to write chronologically. Because I am a (mostly) pantser, sometimes I don’t know what happens next. However, it’s not uncommon to have an amazing scene that takes place three chapters down pop up in my head. When this happens, I allow myself to write it even though I’m not there yet.

Pros

-          Strangely enough, this method allows me to connect the dots easier. If a character’s state of mind has changed from chapter five to chapter eight, it’s often easier for me to work backwards than to try to figure out immediately what happens next.

-          If I can’t figure out what comes next, I freeze and freak myself out. If I skip ahead, I don’t break my momentum.

Cons

-          Since I wrote this manuscript all in one Word document, it was a little jarring to review it when the scenes were all out of order. One day, I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to stop and put them in order to get my head screwed on straight.

-          There’s a chance that scenes won’t work, and the story doesn’t come together like I envisioned. That didn’t happen with this manuscript, but it was a concern.

One other thing – if I do have scenes pop into my head, while I’m writing another scene, I’ll jot a quick note at the end of the manuscript, so I don’t lose it and come back to it later.

I admit my process might be a little easier for me because I’m targeting Harlequin’s Kimani Press Romance line, which requires 55,000 word manuscripts. If I were writing a full-length single title, I might not be able to keep all the details straight in my head and would probably benefit from editing while I write.

So there you have it. That’s how I do what I do. Am I crazy?

What about you? What’s your process? Do you write and edit at the same time? Do you write chronologically? Has your method evolved over time?

Thanks, Jamie!  And y'all don't forget to stop by her blog and give her some love. 

**Today's Theme Song**

"This is How We Do It" - Montell Jordan

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

The Professional Online Presence

 

I have a special treat for you guys over the next two weeks. I have a few things going on that are going to take me away from the blog (family in town, then ear tube/adenoid surgery for my kidlet, and hopefully a family vacay if the surgery goes okay.) 

So I've asked some of my lovely and talented writerly friends to stop by and grace us with their awesomeness. 

First on the block is the fabulous Sierra Godfrey. Beyond her super-awesome blog and her deep understanding of the art of sarcasm, Sierra is just good people as we say round here. So if you're not following her--get to it! Seriously, she's one of my must-reads.

Now I'll turn it over to Sierra who has a post that dovetails nicely with what we talked about on Friday.

The Professional Online Presence

  
First of all, I want to thank Roni for giving me the opportunity to guest post on her blog. I know I don’t have to tell you that Roni is a stand up blogitizen. Over the past year, I’ve blogged a lot about blog design, web sites, and general marketing for writers before agent and publication. I think I can say confidently that Roni and I have always been firmly in agreement that a professional blog is important.
 
Heck, it might even get you an agent.


 
Roni’s professional, active online presence surely influenced her agent, Sara Megibow, before signing (although I think her kick-ass writing had a lot to do with that, too). I wanted to talk today about some of the elements you might want to consider developing for yourself. A caveat first, though: by no means are you required to do any of these things. However, presenting yourself professionally when you make your online footprint as a writer is always a good idea, just as is writing a professional query. Here are some of the elements you might consider in your overall online footprint:


 
A website or a blog with a clean, professional layout.  
This doesn’t mean no design elements, but it does mean being tasteful. Limit bright, flashy things, and try to stay away from the hard-to-read fonts. A black background was cool back in the early days of the web-- but it’s not cool now, it’s hard to read white text on. Very hard. Make it easy for your viewers to see what you have to say. Here’s a secret: if your web site or blog is appallingly difficult to look at, people will read your blog in a reader like Google Reader--and that means commenting.


 
Professional information about you.
Your blog or website should contain An "About Me" page--and it shouldn’t involve tawdry tales of what you did with your neighbor last weekend, nor should it include the photos of the event. That said, it’s good to put some personality in it--but try to keep only as much personality as you would want a prospective employer having. Check for typos. I ran across a writer’s blog shortly before drafting this post that had typos throughout the About Me section, and even worse--called attention to it by saying “attention agents!” Honestly, it didn’t leave a good impression. I have more specific tips on an About Me section here: http://sierragodfrey.blogspot.com/2009/12/about-you-section.html

A dedicated e-mail address.
You’ll want to use a dedicated address for querying, but it’s also nice to have one for correspondence with others throughout the blogosphere. Ideally, you want an email address that doesn’t start with “Vegasbabe1876xxx00,” and you shouldn’t have any spam blockers setup that require people to register to email you.



A page that describes your writing.
It should state up front what you write, the genres you write in, and if you've been published. It's okay to have a placeholder for this and list only the basics. ("I am working on a novel.") I know of a blogger who was contacted by an agent based on what she wrote on her blog, and having this kind of information available might help.



Cleanliness.
I don’t mean site design, here. I mean, keep things clean. Don’t bash other writers or publishing professionals. Don’t air your rage unless you can do so in a considered way that presents a good argument for something. This is a cornerstone of being professional online, really.



A focus.
Lots of advice about successful blogging and online presence will tell you that writing to a specific audience is the way to go. But what does that mean, exactly? When you’re a writer, either unpublished, unagented, or agented, or anywhere in between, you’re probably not writing for readers --yet (although your followers could become future readers). You’re writing for the community of other writers. So, will you dispense writing advice, explore writing topics, or post excepts of your work? It’s up to you, but one of the best ways to focus your wares (your writing) is to create posts that will demonstrate the way you write. If you write humor, you’d want to write posts with a lot of humor.




I think the key to being professional online is to do what you like doing--that is, if you don’t enjoy twittering, or facebooking, but love blogging-- do that. Remember that if you’re peddling yourself as a writer with aspirations of publication, this is your foot in the door for future promotion. Use the community you engage with to your advantage by making friends and supporting others. Give agents and editors a reason to say, “Damn, where’s this person’s email address, because I’m writing him or her right now!”

Sierra, thanks so much for all the terrific information. Lots to consider!

So what do you think is vital to presenting yourself as a professional online? What will turn you off when you go to someone's website?

**Today's Theme Song (Author's Choice)**

"The Reeling" - Passion Pit

(player in sidebar, take a listen)