Story Layers: Finding Your Guacamole

Photo by erin.kkr (click pic for link)

Many of you brave souls are deep in the trenches of NaNoWriMo crafting that fast draft at break neck speed, hoping to reach the finish line. But after the calendar clicks over to December 1, what's next? Revising sure, but what kind of revising?

You're going to need more than grammar fixes and word cutting. What most of you will have is a skeleton of a story with characters and conflict holding it together--a solid base on which you can create something great. But you're going to have to add some meat (and guacamole), layers--like the dip above--otherwise, you'll just have a big pile of bland beans.

Layering Your Novel after the First Draft

 

1. Put movement into each scene to give bodies to the talking heads.

--People don't usually just stay there and talk and sigh, they do things.

2. Insert the senses into a scene.

--We often rely too much on vision in that first draft. We experience things in the world through all five senses, make sure your character does too.

3. Pump up your setting descriptions.

--This is always a trouble area for me. When I'm writing that first draft, I don't want to waste time describing how a house looks, but it's necessary (in moderation) to ground your reader and enrich the scene.

4. Inject emotion into scenes

--Many times we get so wrapped up in A happens then B then C that we forget to put in those internal reaction and emotions. Ever read a love scene that read like an instruction manual? Ugh. Without emotion the scene will fall flat.

5. Beef up your dialogue

--Find places where you just got the words out and layer in some character voice. And make sure your dialogue reads realistic.

6. Sneak in backstory

--In first drafts, I tend to info dump backstory. Go back, chop up the chunks and sprinkle it throughout. (like the olives in the dip)

7. Foreshadowing

--Sometimes when your start, you don't have the end in mind. Once you're done with draft one, you know the secret. Now you can go back and tuck little hints to foreshadow.

8. Tighten tension

--Tension is an art of pacing. In the first run through, a scene that was intended to be tense may fall short because it was rushed. Go back, slow it down, stretch the tension until taut.

9. Add humor (if appropriate)

--There are usually moments you passed up that were great opportunities to elicit a smile from your reader or strengthen your character's voice with a little humor/sarcasm.

10. Weave in subplots.

--Now that you have the main plot hammered out, enhance your story with a subplot here and there.

11. Break out the thesaurus

--I usually can't think of the exact write word the first time around--especially with verbs. So I use my favorite goto words and some adverbs. Then, during revisions, I find/search those words and replace them with something that is stronger and more fitting.

--Words I use ad nauseum in a first draft: walked, looked, stood, smiled, pulled, pushed, just, back, eyebrows, hand/s, sighed, sat

--If you're not sure what your addiction words are, go to Wordle and paste in your manuscript, your drugs of choice will be the biggest words. Here's my revised novel's Wordle:

As you can see I still have some work to do with a few words, but you should have seen it before, "just" was like a billboard, lol.

source: the art of layering

So what ingredients does your first draft usually need most? Do you typically finish the first draft and then do these layers? Or, do you do it smaller chunks--going back after finishing a chapter and pumping it up? What other things do you do to elevate that humble rough draft?

**Today's Theme Song**

"Elevation"-- U2

(player in sidebar, take a listen to do it old school)

POV Advantages and Pitfalls

When I started my first novel, I didn't give POV much thought. I was going to write in first person. Why? I dunno...seemed obvious. I wanted my readers to feel close to my character. And that's the best way to do it, right?

Well, maybe, but not necessarily. First person came with a lot of restrictions and forced me to tell the story from one character's perspective. So making sure she "saw" everything that needed to be seen was a challenge. At the time, I didn't even realize I had another option at my disposal.

But then when I started to research my romance, I realized that the common romance structure is third person limited or deep third person POV. I had read hundreds of books using that POV, but had never realized exactly what I was reading. I just lumped third person into all one category. And once I started writing in deep POV, I found that this style POV came much easier to me and allowed me the flexibility I wanted.

So I thought I would give a brief overview of POVs so that you can know what options are out there:

First person

Told from the inner perspective ("I") of one character.

Ex.) a LOT of YA novels, the Sookie Stackhouse/True Blood series (although after seeing the show, which deviates from only Sookie's perspective, we've gotten a number of new interesting story lines with secondary characters that would have never been possible in the books because Sookie wouldn't have been privy to "see" them.)

Exception: in rare instances, using more than one "I" perspective can work. New Moon did this with Bella and Jacob (kind of drove me crazy though), Perfect Chemistry by Simone Elkeles alternated chapters with the heroine and hero from first person POV.

Advantages:

--If written well, your reader will feel like they are part of the character and will get to know them fully through their inner thoughts and storytelling voice.

--Intimate and emotionally intense

--When writing it may be easier to become the character

--Makes the story feel "true"

--This often feels most natural when you first start writing because, well, we think in first person.

Disadvantages:

--First person can sounds monotonous for an entire book

--If the reader doesn't like the main character of his/her voice, you're toast

(I've heard people say this about PC Cast's House of Night novels. I enjoy the MC's voice, but some people find her annoying and therefore don't like reading the books despite a good story.)

--It's easy to get a little too wrapped up in introspection and not enough dialogue

--Sometimes when writing "I" you let too much of yourself enter the character. Have to remember to react as the character not as you.

Third Person Limited/Deep POV

Very similar to first person. You write from inside one character's head at a time--but it doesn't have to be the same character for the whole book (although it can be).

Ex.) Wicked Lovely (Melissa Marr), Uglies (Scott Westerfeld). Almost any romance you pick up.

Advantages:

--You can write from more than one character's POV. In romance, that means you get the hero's perspective as well as the heroine's which adds to the tension. In suspense, you can have a few chapters from the villain's POV.

--Your MC doesn't have to be everywhere and with everyone to make sure the reader gets all important facts of the story.

--Readers are used to this POV and it becomes invisible

--Less likely to become monotonous because you're getting different perspectives

Disadvantages

--Not as immediate and intimate as first person

--You can be tempted to head hop

--You have to get to know every POV character intimately and develop distinct voices, which can involve more work. Your villain's POV can't sound like your MC's. And your hero needs to think like a guy, not a woman--there's a big difference.

Third Person Omniscient

Narrator is all-knowing and separate from the story--playing God. He/She knows what each character is thinking and can see it all. "Little did Bob know that today was the last day he'd see the sun."

Ex.) This is seen mostly in classics and epic fantasies/sci-fi. Lord of the Rings.

--I won't do a detailed breakdown of this one since it is not commonly used in modern fiction. But the main advantage is being able to tell the reader anything you need them to know. Disadvantage is it distances the reader from the characters.

WARNING: What to watch out for in first and deep third person POV...

• Cut out these words from your MC's voice: decided, thought, knew, remembered, noticed, saw, smelled, realized, heard, felt, understood, etc. These take us out of deep POV and "tell".

Wrong: She saw him smile at her and felt warmth course through her. She realized with dismay that she still loved him.

Better: He smiled and warmth coursed through her. Crap. I still love this idiot.

Wrong: I saw the empty living room and remembered how my grandmother used to braid my hair in front of the fireplace and tell me stories about her childhood.

Better: I stared at the empty living room and tears stung my eyes. Grandma used to braid my hair in front of the...

• Don't report things that the MC can't see/know for herself or wouldn't notice under normal circumstances. Stay in her head and see through her eyes.

Wrong: Her face turned beet red. (She can't see her own face.) The girls in the corner laughed at her reaction. (She can't know exactly why they are laughing, only guess.)

Better: Her face grew hot, and the girls in the corner pointed and laughed.

Alright, that turned out longer than expected.

So what about you? What's your favorite POV to write in or read? Do you find yourself falling out of POV with those last two things (I do!)? Have you ever read a first person book that you couldn't finish because you didn't like the MC?

**Today's Theme Song**

"Lost in Your Eyes"-- Debbie Gibson

(player in sidebar, take a listen to do it old school)

What Makes a Good Crit Buddy?

I'm a lucky girl. I have kickass crit group, a great beta reader, and friends (bloggy and otherwise) who have generously read for me and offered feedback. And what is always interesting to me is how different people can see such different things. That's why it's important to make sure you have a wide variety of people critting you.

Types of critters:

Partner

--This person invests in you as much as you invest in them. You exchange equally and you offer the entire gamut of feedback: line edits, plotting, characterization, story, pacing, etc.

--This is the person that you also go to for advice on writing career things

--I think having one of these is vital, but not everyone can fulfill this role because it takes a lot of time investment

Mentor

--This person is further on the path in their writing career, maybe they've already been published. They can offer you guidance along the way.

Proofreader (Grammar Nazi)

--The detail-oriented English teacher type. She can spot a dangling modifier or misplaced comma from twenty yards away. She focuses on the trees, not the forest.

Cheerleader

--This reader sends your crit back with lots of smiley faces, lol's, and positive comments along with the negative things. They may not be as detailed as the proofreader, but they give you the confidence keep going. This is the person who will talk you off the ledge when you're ready to give up.

Whipcracker

--This person doesn't let you get away with anything. If you have deadline, she's poking you until you meet it. If you get lazy in your writing and try to sneak in a little telling, she will call your butt out.

Reader

--This person is not a writer but is a voracious reader. She is looking at the forest, not the trees. This is also invaluable because SHE (or he) is your customer. This is who you are ultimately writing for.

Looking at this list, I definitely have each of these in my beta reading ranks. As for my own style, I hope that I am a partner to my crit group and regular beta readers. If I'm just critting somebody as a one off--then I'm more of a tactful whipcracker and reader (<-this is fair warning for any of those who take me up on the offer at the bottom of the page.)

So, how do you know you've found the right crit buddy?

A good buddy...

Listens to your suggestion and even if they don't always take them, they give them serious consideration.

Makes an effort to understand your writing and where you are coming from.

Gives as much as she gets.

Is honest--even when she knows it might be hard for your to hear

Doesn't just point our problems, but offers suggestions

Appreciates constructive criticism

Takes the time to point out what she loves, not just what's wrong (that smiley face here and there can go a long way when you've received a rough crit)

And beware the toxic crit parter, this person...

Throws up the defenses the minute you say something negative or suggest changes

Has a million excuses as to why your suggestions don't work--you don't understand their genre, you're not "getting" their point, etc.

Rarely implements the changes you offer.

Tells you what's wrong in your manuscript but doesn't offer help on what they think would fix it.

Only wants accolades. When those don't come, they get angry, pouty, or generally difficult.

Doesn't put forth as much effort on your work as you do on theirs

Tears apart your work without tact or helpful suggestions and if you get hurt, tell you that you need a thicker skin.

--There is a huge difference between "this sucks, I'm totally lost" and "this chapter may need a little reworking to make the plot points clearer"

Source: The Care and Nurturing of Critique Relationship

If this toxic buddy is in your life, fire them. You don't need that in your life. Writing is hard enough--don't add to your stress. Find good critters and move on.

**Okay, so in a few days I may be looking for a few "readers" for the first fifty pages of my romance, Wanderlust. As I mentioned, I'm entering a few contests, and even though it's been through detailed critting already, I'd love overarching opinions on those contest type questions (i.e. Do you want to read more? Does the voice shine through? etc.)

You don't have to be a writer, just a reader (preferably of romance). But if you are a writer, I will offer something in return: either a detailed crit of your first chapter (up to 15pgs) or an overall opinion of your first 50pgs.

If anyone is interested, email me (click on the email button at the top right of the page). If I get more than three offers, I'll just pick three at random since I won't have time to crit more than that. (Warning: my story contains some four letter words, so if you're offended by that, please don't apply.)** REQUEST NOW CLOSED--Thanks to all those who offered to read for me! You guys rock. :)

Alright, so what kind of critter are you? Do you recognize any of these types in your circle? Have you ever had a toxic beta reader?

**Today's Theme Song**

"Lipstick and Bruises"-- Lit

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

He Said, She Said: Dialogue

Yesterday Stacey asked in the comments if I would do a post on dialogue. So Stacey, here's your request and dedication (said in the voice of Casey Kasem).

Dialogue is one of my favorite things to write and read. It's a great workhorse in your manuscript and can handle many tasks for you: advancing plot, building tension, revealing character, establishing motivation, and setting tone among other things. And with all these roles to play, make sure it is filling one on of them. Don't have lackluster chatter just to fill space--like anything else in your story, it must serve a purpose.

Okay, so once you have a purpose for your dialogue what dos and don'ts should you watch out for?

Red Flags

Using too much dialect.

--Regional dialects can add authenticity to your story, but too much becomes tiresome to read.

Being too formal. People don't talk in complete sentences all the time.

--"Are you ready to go to school today?" vs. "Ready for school?"

Trying to recreate dialogue too realistically.

--Yes we pause a lot and say um and uh in real life, but you don't need to put that in your writing, unless you are trying to show nervousness or something.

Addressing the person by name all the time.

--Think about how many times you actually say the other person's name when having a conversation--hardly ever. (I used to do this is my writing ALL the time.)

--"I don't know, Bob. Those pants make you look fat." "But Helen, they match my shirt."

Vague pronouns.

--If three women are talking, be careful of saying "she said" and not defining which she it is.

Having characters tell someone something they already know or would never actually discuss just so you can let the reader know.

--"As you know, you're boyfriend cheated on you."

--"You're never going to catch me. As soon as I kill you, I'm going to escape to my secret house in Seattle where no one will be able to find me."

Long drawn out speeches. You're not Shakespeare--drop the soliloquies and monologues.

--Telling in dialogue is STILL telling

Going nuts with non-said dialogue tags or adverbs modifying said.

--In many cases, we're told to use a stronger verb instead of the standard one for verbs such as walked, looked, stood, etc. However, this does not apply to "said". Said is considered invisible to the reader. The shouted/muttered/expressed/pontificated stand out to the reader and remind them that they are reading a story instead of experiencing it.

--This goes for tagging that said with adverbs as well--try to avoid it.

All characters sound alike

--Even without speaker attribution, you should be able to tell most of the time who is talking just by how and what they say.

--Your male lead and female lead should not sound identical. Men and women talk differently. Men, typically, use fewer words to get a point across.

Watch your punctuation.

--Avoid the exclamation point except in rare circumstances--it's melodramatic.

--Semi-colons and colons are not for speech.

--Em-dashes can be used to show a break in thought or an interuption.

--Ellipses can be used to indicate a pause or speech that trails off (use sparingly)

Direct thoughts should be italicized.

--This doesn't mean every thought the narrator has--but a direct thought. Usually you can distinguish them from narrative because they are in present tense vs. past.

--How had she had gotten herself into this position? God, what is wrong with me?

 

Don't bury your dialogue. I talked about this before, but here is a refresher for those of you who are new to the blog.

Dialogue should be in one of the following structures:

Dialogue(D)-->narrative(N)-->dialogue

"Hello," she said, smiling. "What's your name?"

N-->D

She smiled. "Hello, what's your name?"

D->N

"Hello? What's your name?" she asked.

Don't do what I used to do all over the place:

She grinned at the boy. "Hello, what's your name?" she asked.

--see how the dialogue is buried in the narrative? This slows down your pacing and gives the dialogue less impact. Think of dialogue as a book end--it never should be hidden amongst the books (narrative).

Make your dialogue rock:

Read it out loud or have someone read it to you. Does it sound natural?

Contractions are your friends.

When you can avoid attributions (said), do. Either take them out completely or use action beats.

--She hugged her mother. "I love you." (It is assumed that the person doing the action--the beat--in the sentence is the speaker.)

Ground your dialogue in action. Otherwise, you have talking heads.

--This doesn't have to be for every statement uttered, but people move while they are talking, they sip drinks, smile, adjust their skirt, play with their hair, etc.

--Imagine you are writing a screenplay, the actors would need stage direction to tell them what they should be doing during that dialogue.

source

So what about you? What are your biggest challenges with dialogue?

 

 

**Today's Theme Song**

"Talk to Me"-- Buckcherry

(player in sidebar, take a listen)

WIP Wednesday, Internal Editors, and Cool Awards

If I were doing NaNo, I'd be kicked off the team by now. However, I have made some progress on Exposure Therapy. I'm sitting at 2300 words and am almost finished with chapter one. As you've noticed, I've been doing post on beginnings--which of course have been completely self-serving since I'm at a beginning. But this research has also brought out my inner editors in full force. I'm now convinced it's not just one, but a pack of mean girls.

So I'm hoping this week that I can bribe them to go to the mall or something because I need to write without their "help".

Alright, now for some fun stuff. Awards!

First, Dawn over at Plotting and Scheming gifted me with the lovely Best Blog Award. If you're not following Dawn, you're missing out-go follow.

Now for the rules:
1. To accept the award, post it on your blog together with the name of the person who has granted the award and his/her blog link.
2. Pass the award to other bloggers that you have recently discovered and think are great! Remember to contact the bloggers to let them know they have been chosen for this award.

I'm going to stick with the rules and select people I've recently discovered.

1. Melane at Chasing the Dream

2. Natalie at Natalie Bahm

3. Gem at Somewhere South of Heaven

4. Tamika at The Write Worship

5. Beth at This Mommy's Life

And then Ash. Elizabeth at From Ramblings to Interviews created a brand new award called the Helpful Blogger Award, which she has passed along to me. I really like the idea behind this one because I think that the support and help I've found from fellow bloggers is one of the best things about being online. Go check out her site!

The Helpful Blogger Award Rules

Include the award logo in your blog or post.

Link to post where you received the award.

Nominate seven blogs that you feel are helpful to others.

Be sure to link to your nominees within your post.

Let them know they've received the award by commenting on their blog.

Share one thing that no one knows about you & quote a sentence from your favorite book.

Alright, in spirit of the award, I'm selecting people that no matter what their post, I always learn something.

1. Susan at A Walk in My Shoes--I know most of you follow her already, but she's always has a helpful tidbit (and she's a great beta reader to me as well)

2. Jennifer at Me, My Muse and I

3. Sierra at Sierra Godfrey

4. T. Anne at White Platonic Dreams

5. Julie Dao at Silver Lining

6. Jody at Jody Hedlund

7. Stephanie at Chronicles of a Novice Writer

Okay, now for something no one knows about me. Hmm... I'm so afraid of bugs that, say, if a caterpillar were on my shirt, I would have no hesitation to yank off the shirt and run screaming even if I was in someone's front yard in full view of the street. Not that this ever happened (cough) but just as a hypothetical example.

A favorite quote from a book. That's hard. It's usually something that makes me laugh rather than something that's exceptionally profound. I'll have to think on this one, in the meantime, you can check out my goodreads quotes in the sidebar.

Alright, that's all for today. How's everyone else's WIP going? What are your internal editors like?

**Today's Theme Song**

"What You Give" - Tesla

(player in sidebar, go ahead and take a listen)

Story Beginnings: Agent and Publisher Opinions

Photo by Dave Gingrich (click pic for link)

Last week I talked about the opening sentence. You guys had a great debate in the comments, so it's clear that we all have different opinions. So, in lieu of so many of you starting a new story for NaNoWriMo, I thought I would share some of the tidbits from Hooked that the author got straight from agents and editors.  

What beginning makes them stop reading?

• You didn't get them on page one. We need to have them at hello.
• Starting with backstory or a static character introduction.
• Hooking the reader with something that has nothing to do with the story--a gotcha.
• Not clearly identifying the POV character--sex, age, etc.
• Starting with weather, scenery, dreams, waking up for the day, or a passive scene (any description should be about movement).
• Too much tell not enough show.
• Pulling a bait and switch--i.e. having an opening that is dark and serious then jumping to a chick litty voice in the next scene/chapter.
• Clunky sentences, bad grammar, hemorrhaging adverbs, etc. One editor said that if sentence one isn't good, why should he expect it's going to get any better with sentence two. Others said that by the end of the first page, they know if the person can write or not.

So what should you do to get them to turn the page?

• Start with people--novels are not about scenery
• Don't open with a villain. You want your readers to connect with your protagonist first. (An agent admitted that many established authors do this, but it's typically in series where the reader is already familiar with the protagonist.)
• Starting in the middle of the action.
• Having an irresistible hook.
• Action, conflict, crisis, or danger (this from agent Janet Reid).

Additional advice from the agents/editors...

• Don't worry about your beginning until you finish the book. Once you have a whole, it's easier to know where to start.
• Oftentimes the first three chapters can be scrapped because it's just you working out the story for yourself.

Alright, so at least that gives us permission to write crappy beginnings the first go round. :) 

So what about you guys? What do you think of this advice? Do you have trouble finding the right place to start? Have you made any of these mistakes above?

**Today's Theme Song**

"I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" - U2

(player in sidebar, go ahead and take a listen)

Writing Contests: Should you take a shot?

It seems to be the time of year for writing contests. Besides the small ones on blogs for opening lines and such, there are dozens of more formal ones put on by local chapters of writer's groups. These contests usually involve submitting part of your manuscript (15, 25, 50 pages depending on contest) and a synopsis or query letter. In the first round, your work is evaluated by a panel of judges which typically includes published authors. Then if you final, you move on to another judge--and here's the exciting part--this judge is usually an editor at a relevant publishing house.

These contests cost money, which I know makes some think--wait, I'm paying for a contest. Aren't those usually free? But keep in mind that these are often put on by local chapters who have their own administrative costs to run such a venture and the fees are usually reasonable--usually around $25. If you enter at the national level, like RWA's Golden Heart, then the price goes up.

So is entering a contest worth that $20-$50 bucks you're shelling out? Well, I've been giving this some thought since there are a number of contests with upcoming deadlines and here are the benefits I see:

1. You get to see your score sheets and feedback from the judges. So basically a critique, in some cases, by a published author.

2. If you place, you now have something to add to that bio paragraph in your query letter.

3. Impartial feedback. These judges are not your mom, your friends, or even your critique buddies whom you already have a relationship with. The judges don't even know your name when they are looking at the manuscript.

4. There are usually cash prizes if you place.

5. Did I mention that if you final, your entry usually goes to an acquiring editor? Hello, nurse! No slush pile to sit in--your work in front of someone who can offer you a contract.

On the negative side...

--Winning doesn't guarantee publication

--Judging, like anything else, is subjective. I've heard of people winning one contest and then not even finaling in a another with the same exact manuscript.

--It costs money

--If you have a book that doesn't neatly fit into a category, it can be hard to figure out the right section to enter your manuscript in.

And just as a side note, many of these contests are run by romance writers chapters. However, that doesn't mean your book has to be straight up romance. Almost every contest I've looked at has a young adult category and a mainstream fiction category--as long your book has "romantic elements", you can enter. Of course, there are other contests for specific things like memoirs, screenplays, paranormal, horror, mystery, thrillers, etc. If you want a comprehensive list of a variety of contests, check out this link. Although this site lists last years dates, these contests are run yearly, so check out the provided links on the page to get updated info.

As for me, I've decided the benefits outweigh any drawbacks. It can't hurt to take a shot, right? I'm entering my romance in three contests this year. I've never done one of these before, so I'll be sure to let you guys know what the experience is like once I get my results sometime in Jan./Feb./March

How about you? Are any of you going to enter any contests this year? For those of you who have done the contest thing, what was your experience like? Was it worth it?

**Today's Theme Song**

"Hey Man Nice Shot" - Filter

(player in sidebar, go ahead and take a listen)

Friday Face Off: Is the First Line THAT Important?

With the recent opening paragraph contests over at Nathan Bransford's and Lori Brighton's blogs, along with reading Hooked, I'm getting seriously paranoid about the gravity of sentence one of page one in chapter one.

In Hooked, Les Edgerton says:

Your first sentence or paragraph may be the most important writing in your story. They may well be what sells your manuscript to an agent or editor.

It also can be the difference maker on a sale to a reader later on. I have to admit that I am one of those people that opens to the first page and reads the first line when I'm browsing in a bookstore. Even Amazon posts the opening line underneath the titles of many of their books. I read the blurb for the book too, but a great opening line can win me over. So we may only have seconds to impress that agent/publisher/reader.

No pressure, right?

So what the heck makes a great opening sentence? Les suggests that the first sentence is "part of the whole" and should contain at least a hint of the end.

When I first read that, I was like, oh hell, that seems impossible. But then I thought through some great opening lines I've read and he's right. Many opening sentences hint at the theme or foreshadow future events if only in a subtle way.

I grabbed a few random books off my shelves for some examples:

The whole enormous deal wouldn't have happened, none of it, if Dad hasn't messed up his hip moving the manure spreader.--Dairy Queen, Catherine Murdock

Just when I though my day couldn't get any worse I saw the dead guy standing next to my locker.--Marked, PC Cast and Kristen Cast

The terror, which would not end for another twenty-eight years--if it ever did end--began, so far as I know or can tell, with a boat made from a sheet of newspaper floating down a gutter swollen with rain.--It, Stephen King

Years later Amy would remember the day she saw inside the spider house.--Nazareth Hill, Ramsey Campbell

Sybil Davison has a genius I.Q. and has been laid by at least six different guys.--Forever, Judy Blume

As an interactive horror experience, with beasts from Hell, mayhem, gore, and dismemberment, it was an impressive event. As a high school prom, however, the evening was marginally less successful.--Prom Dates From Hell, Rosemary Clement-Moore

Great lines, right? Made me want to read more for sure. And having read these books, each one of these hints at the overall theme or the ending.

When I'm writing a rough draft, I try not to think about this heavily weighted line, but at the same time, I think if you can get that first line in decent shape early on, it can help guide you through the rest of the book.

Here are the openings from both my romance (which I've posted once before) and my newest WIP. (The new WIP is just started, so this line will probably change because although it hints at theme, it doesn't hint at end.) You can let me know if these hook you or not.

From Wanderlust:

Southern gentility be damned. Nice was getting her nowhere. Aubrey Bordelon put her hands on her hips and attempted an I-mean-business face. “Look, I’m not here to get laid.”

From Exposure Therapy:

Brynn LaBreck’s date was spiraling toward DEFCON 1—imminent disaster. Her sexy banker had jumped from possible fantasy fulfiller to potential therapy client in a span of twenty minutes.

So what do you think about the whole first line emphasis? Do you believe it's well-founded or do you think we shouldn't stress so much about one simple sentence/paragraph? What are your first lines or what's your favorite first line from a book?

**Today's Theme Song**

"Ten Seconds to Love" - Motley Crue

(player in sidebar, go ahead and take a listen)

The Truth Revealed!

Thank you to everyone who took the time to ask questions yesterday. Ya'll really came up with some that made me think! Alright so here goes...

Susan asked:

Who is Hooked written by?

I meant to link to it. It's written by Les Edgerton (link in my good reads box in sidebar).

What's the funniest thing that ever happened to you?

My husband and I met on the internet. Not on a dating site, those weren't really a big thing then. He was looking for someone to chat with about LSU football because he was homesick and living in TX, and I was going to LSU, so he IMed me not even knowing if I was a chick or guy. Anyway, we ended up connecting immediately and chatted nightly. We talked about everything--music, interests, our families, our hopes and dreams. The only thing we never approached was the topic that everybody else on the internet was always talking about--sex. I was a good southern girl and he was a gentleman.

So, when we eventually decided to meet, which let me tell you was totally out of character for me. If it were in a book, the reader would have been like "this cautious girl would NEVER meet some stranger off the internet." But anyway, I picked him up from the airport (with mace and a secret code word to use on a phone call to my mother if necessary, lol) and we went to dinner. We were both beyond nervous. Even though we were now talking regularly on the phone, face to face is way different. So we stumbled through dinner, then I drove him to his hotel room.

The plan was to chat for a while there before I went home. I was home for the summer staying with my parents, so I didn't want to bring him there yet. Well, we show up at the hotel and he runs in to get his key. He walks out with an ashen face, tells me that his room's a/c was broken so they upgraded him. We walk into his room and there's a hot tub next to the bed and mints on the pillows. Yeah. The honeymoon suite. I thought the poor guy was going to throw up. He insisted on showing me his reservation to prove that he didn't set this up, lol. I tried to play it off and act like I wasn't nervous as hell. We ended up sitting on opposite sides of the room while we talked. The bed was like this beacon of sexual tension in between us. I think I lasted fifteen minutes before I made some excuse to leave. He looked more than relieved. Of course, then I went home, called him, and we talked for two hours. Looking back now, it was one of the funniest things ever.

Two years later we rented out that same room for our actual honeymoon night. :)

Eight years later, I still can't help but laugh every time we go home and pass that hotel.

Deb asked:

Have you ever missed a great opportunity that you now regret?

I'm sure there were many. I was well on my way in college to getting into a great PhD psychology program. I was working under one of the leading psychology of sexuality professors at the time and he was going to recommend me to one of his colleagues for her program. I started getting burned out on the research part after doing an undergraduate thesis (on the brain differences between sexually coercive and non-coercive men, in case anyone wants to know), so I switched my plans to go to a social work masters program instead of the psyc one. I thought I was more interested in the clinical applications vs. the research. Looking back, the research was more my cuppa.

BUT having said that, I have the philosophy of not regretting decisions because each one got me here, and here is pretty sweet. :)

Amber asked:

How old is my kiddo?

I have one son who will turn two years old in two weeks.

What's up with my Shadow Falls manuscript?

I have one partial left out, but I am not holding out much hope. I've learned so much since I started querying that novel that now I can see many problems in it. It's in need of major surgery. I'm currently deciding whether it's worth completely tearing it apart to rebuild it or if it just needs to be tucked in a drawer as my "learning" novel.

Stephanie asked:

I see you are an RWA member. I have thought of joining but wasn't sure if it was worth it. One of the members of my writers group is a member of RWA and she told me out local RWA chapter concentrates on writing Harlequin type books...very formulated. I'm more of a write what I want type. So back to my question.....is it worth it to you???

First, I'll say that I think it's a bit of a misconception that Harlequins are formulated these days. My romance falls under the Harlequin Blaze style and the only "formula" they require is--has to be between 55-60k words, has to primarily focus on the romantic relationship, has to have fully described sensual scenes, and has to have happily ever after. Those guidelines outside of word count could apply to most mainstream romance novels. Okay (stepping off my soapbox now :) )

Each chapter group is different, but mine has a wide variety of authors writing all kinds of things--romantic suspense, young adult, erotic romance, paranormal, mystery, etc. Only a few are writing category (harlequin) length. And I've only just joined, but I really enjoyed the last meeting I attended. Plus, I think the support members give to each other will be worth it alone. I would suggest attending a meeting (most will let you attend without joining for a meeting or two to see if you like it.) That way you can see if you mesh with the group.

Beth asked:

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you want to live?

I love the rain, the mountains, and water. Plus, I've always lived in blazing hot places, so I'd probably say someplace like Lake Tahoe where you get the scenery and all the seasons. I think anywhere in the Northwest--Seattle, Portland, etc. would work for me too.

Stephanie F. asked:

Are you doing NaNoWriMo?

No, with a toddler at home, I think 50k words in a month would be setting myself up for failure. I'll be cheerleading the rest of you guys though.

Betty asked:

If you could be the best at anything in the world what would you choose?

I'd just like to be the best version of myself I can be.

Melane asked:

My question is what is the first thing you will do when you get an agent? How about the first thing you do when you have your first book deal?

Remember in Wayne's World when they dance around and sing "We've got five thousand dollars, we've got five thousand dollars!"? Okay, picture that, insert "an agent or a book deal" for anywhere they say "5000 dollars". I tried to find the video but youtube let me down.

Stacey asked:

Where do you see yourself in five years?

I hope to be published and writing full time. However, if that doesn't happen, I will have to return to work when my son starts school. I'd be a high school English teacher most likely (while writing at night).

Tamika asked:

What made you decide to change your profile picture?

I realized that I really liked being able to put a face with a name for the blogs I read, so I figured I should provide you guys with the same.

Who are your top three Agent choices?

1. The agent who loves my book.

2. The agent who can sell my book

3. The agent that is great to work with

:) I can't pick favorites, lol.

Tina Lynn asked:

I've noticed that you keep posting quotes from The Mortal Instruments, so my question is...If you had to dump Jace for another fictional boyfriend, who would it be? He had better be awesome, because Jace is irreplaceable in my opinion.

Jace is yummy indeed. But Eric from the Sookie Stackhouse books gives him a run for his money. Jamie from the Outlander series is a pretty great candidate too. :)

Stephanie McGee asked:

1- Your two biggest literary crushes show up on your doorstep ready to sweep you off your feet. Who do you go with and why?

Hmm, I'm assuming you mean character crushes and not author crushes right? Let's see, using the question from above, let's say Jace, Eric, and Jamie all showed up at the door. Wait, let me enjoy that visual for a moment. (And since we're in hypothetical world, I'll note I haven't met my hubby yet because he of course trumps them all.) If it's just for a fun night, I'm going with Eric. If it's longer term, probably Jace.

2- Italian or Mexican?

Mexican, no doubt. It's my favorite.

3- What is your favorite accent? The one that makes you swoon every time you hear it?

British, Scottish, and Irish accents really do it for me. I also can't resist a good southern drawl (a la Matthew Mcconaughey) as long as it's not too twangy

PlainOleBob asked:

Of all the comedians, which two do you consider classic, which two ar the funniest, to you?

Hmm, classic I would say Eddie Murphy and Steve Martin. And as for the funniest--Mike Myers and Ben Stiller can almost always get a laugh out of me.

Whew, that's it! Thanks for such great questions. This was fun. Tomorrow...back to our regularly scheduled programming.

So what are some of your answers to these questions?

**Today's Theme Song**

"That's What You Get" - Paramore

(player in sidebar, go ahead and take a listen)

WIP, Award, and Q & A

I actually have progress to report! Okay, well 800 words isn't so wonderful, BUT it's the first pages and those seem to be the hardest for me. And now that I'm reading Hooked, my self-inflicted first line/page/chapter pressure has increased exponentially. (Great book so far, btw. I'll do a post on it soon.)

So I'll count this as progress and post the new WIP in my sidebar even though it's not that many words and probably 300 need to be cut because I had a character show up and try to trump my hero--not good. How does that happen? I just intended him to strode into the scene to add a bit of information, and all of sudden he's exchanging witty banter with my MC. Down boy, you're not supposed to be the hero.

On a different note, I wanted to thank Stephanie at Steph in the City for the Honest Scrap award. I know most of you follow her, but if you're not, you're missing out. She has the uncanny ability of coming up with a topic every day that I can't help but comment on. Thanks again, Steph!

I'm passing this on to five people who I feel are great at being open and honest in their posts.

1. Stacey @ Stacey's Respite

2. Donna @ Donna Hole

3. Julie @ Diary of an Unpublished Wannabe Writer

4. Katie @ Step 1: Write, Edit, and Revise

5. Tina Lynn @ Sweet Niblets

And speaking of honesty, instead of listing ten honest things about myself, I'm going to steal an idea that a few bloggers around town (Stephanie, Stacey, and Sierra) have been doing. The inquisition! Okay, well not that harsh, just q&a.

I don't share a ton of personal information on here, so now's your chance to ask any questions you may have for me. Nothing is off limits. Although if you ask me my weight or something, your comment may be "accidentally" skipped. ;) So ask away. I'll answer them in a future post.

So what do you want to know?

**Today's Theme Song**

"Welcome to My Life" - Simple Plan

(player in sidebar, go ahead and take a listen)

I'm Not Defensive! Psyc 101 for Character Development

Freud Exhibition Photo by Regine Debatty (click pic for link)

As many of you know, my background is in psychology and social work. Although I'm sure my writing could have benefited from an English degree, I'm happy that I chose the path I did because all those psyc classes provided loads of information on why people act the way they do. And this of course is invaluable when creating characters stories.

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I love developing a character's backstory (even if most of it never makes it into the book). This makes the character "real" to me. It gives me a base so that I can answer those questions that come up later in the book: How would MC react to this situation? What emotions would she have?

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One of the most basic things that you should know about your characters is what is their go to reaction to stress? In other words, what's their favorite defense mechanism?

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Freud came up with many different defense mechanisms so I won't list them all, but I'll hit some of the highlights that could help you in character development.

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Level 1 Defenses

These are normal in young childhood, but in adults indicate psychosis.

 

• Denial--Refusing to accept reality. This is a common joke-"you're in denial". But true denial means the person honestly doesn't believe the reality.
• Distortion--Recreating a new version of reality to meet their needs.

Level 2

These are normal in adolescence. In adults, this can indicate severe depression and personality disorders.

 

• Fantasy--Retreating into fantasy world to deal with conflicts.
• Projection--Taking your unacceptable feelings and impulses and assigning them to someone else. It's a version of paranoia. Think of the guy who is always accusing his wife of cheating, but in fact he's the one who's cheating.
• Somatization--Emotional hurt manifesting as physical symptoms. Common in depression--person complains of body aches and feeling tired. I saw this a lot when I worked with teens. If they had a bad night at home, the next day they were feeling sick at school.
• This also can be a cultural thing. Some cultures are not as accepting of people (particularly men) expressing depression/anxiety/etc. so often physical symptoms will pop up instead. Remember this is not a conscious decision on the person's part, this happens subconsciously.
• Passive Aggression--Expressing aggression through indirect means. You're mad at your boss, but instead of confronting her, you "forget" to give her a really important phone message.
• Acting Out--Expressing unconscious desire through action. Teen isn't getting attention at home, so acts out at school to get adults to care.

Level 3

These are commonly found in adults, although they are technically considered "neurotic" in Freud-land.

 

• Displacement--Taking your emotions about something or someone and directing it at a "safer" target. A mom has a bad day at work, but comes home and yells at the kids.
• Dissociation--Completely separating from yourself and the uncomfortable emotions. This is extreme. Can happen when someone is being abused, tortured, raped, etc.
• Intellectualization--Separating the idea/event from the emotions. A cop finds the body of someone he knows, but has to do his job, so he focuses on the forensics of the scene instead of letting himself feel the emotions.
• Reaction Formation--Flipping your feeling to the opposite. You hate your mother in law, but are overly nice when she's around.
• Repression--Pushing thoughts/events that you can't handle into your subconscious. This is what "repressed memories" mean.
• Regression--Reverting to an earlier stage of behavior or development rather than handling the emotions in an adult way. This can be seen in children as well.
• Rationalization--Convincing yourself that your initial impression of a situation was wrong. Someone who loves their job is fired and he starts thinking--I hated that job anyway, the hours sucked, etc.

Level 4

Defenses of the "healthy" adult

 

• Altruism--Finds comfort in helping others. People who were traumatized by Katrina, but went to the Red Cross and volunteered.
• Humor--Ah, my personal favorite. Taking a negative situation and disarming it by seeing the humor in the moment.
• Sublimation--Taking unacceptable impulses and channeling them into something positive. The idea of cutting someone open is fascinating? What do you do? Become a serial killer or a surgeon. Sublimation would be picking surgeon. (Not that all surgeons are sublimated serial killers, lol.)
• Compensation--Counterbalancing your weak points by emphasizing your strong points. This is my first thought when I see the five foot tall guy climbing into one of those monster trucks.
• Suppression--Tucking away unwanted emotions or impulses to deal with later. A woman is attracted to her married neighbor, but chooses to push down those thoughts since they are not productive.

Wiki source

Alright, hope that wasn't too dry and boring. I really do find knowing which of these my characters possess helps me a lot with story decisions. My romance MC is big on humor and suppression with a touch of repression, so I have a lot to use with her.

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So do any of your characters have any of these in their baggage? Do you have a personal favorite among these that you use in your stories? And, do the psyc posts make you want to poke your eyes out or do you find them helpful? Let me know so that I don't continue to go down a road if no one is interested. :)

**Today's Theme Song**

"I Don't Believe You" - Pink

(player in sidebar, go ahead and take a listen)

It's All About Me: Discovering Author Voice

 Over the weekend I read Allison Brennan's speech about finding your author voice. (Thanks Lynnette for the link to this.) I took a few things away from her speech. One, that she wrote five manuscripts before she sold. And the second was that the key to getting published (in her opinion) was discovering her voice.

Now, we've heard about voice, I've talked about it here. But what I liked about her advice was that she believes our author voice is already in us, we just have to recognize it. After trying out a few different things, she realized that her voice was naturally dark and fit well with suspense. She tried to write a chick-litty mystery and discovered she wasn't so funny on paper.

This got me to thinking (always a dangerous thing) about my own voice. My first book attempt was a dark paranormal YA, or at least that's what I set out for it to be. However, as I wrote it, I found myself with a heavy thread of romance that threatened to take over the story. I also kept slipping in humor and snark at every turn. Not exactly what I was going for, but I couldn't help myself. In addition, it was a fight for me to keep things not too sexy, because it was teens and I knew that wasn't appropriate.

So then I started my contemporary romance. All of a sudden, I didn't have to fight all those natural tendencies. I had free reign to focus on the things that I love writing about. And the book was so much more fun to jump into. It was like slipping into a comfy pair of slippers after trying to wedge my feet into stilettos. I found my voice.

Now I'm not saying that with my voice, I can't write YA or something outside of romance, but I need to probably go for a different type of story than I did with the first one. One that lends itself to my strengths. 

So when you start stressing about voice, look in the mirror. Who are you? Do you tend to see the darker side of things or do you find the humor where others don't? Are you a hopeless romantic or a realist? Are you polite or irreverent? Your voice is already in there, you just have to unearth it.

Don't you ever read a book and think, I could hang out with this author? We know based on how they wrote the story and their characters that we'll probably enjoy their personality. We're hearing their author voice bubble underneath all of it.

So how about you? How would you describe your author (not your character) voice? Have you written a story and realized it didn't fit your natural voice and style? Have you ever read a book and thought, me and this author 

*This post has been revamped from the original.

Love Scenes 101: Don't be Corny or Porn-y

I'm taking a break from Face Off Friday to finish the discussion from yesterday. Today: Love Scenes. This could be that kiss that your readers have been rooting for since page three or it can be full out swinging from the chandeliers. If you've done your job building up that sexual tension, your readers should be biting at the bit to get to this part. So don't let them down with a lame, lackluster scene!

What can turn a hot moment cold?

 

You're squeamish

If you, the author, are not comfortable with the scene, you're readers will be able to tell. Do not write an erotic romance if the thought of typing out four-letter words in a sex scene makes you cringe.

Shallow POV

The reader needs to feel like she is in the moment with the characters. So make sure you use Deep POV effectively and don't pull out of that.

Lack of character development

If your characters are flat, their love scene will be as well.

You haven't established sufficient motivation for the scene.

Don't have them kiss/jump in bed/etc. just because it feels like a good time. Make sure we know why they are doing this now.

You haven't raised the stakes enough.

The risk of them getting together is nil and therefore uninteresting. What consequences could happen now that they are giving in to their love/desire for each other?

No change happens.

Love scenes should change the people involved--be that good or bad.

The scene lacks emotion.

All we have is description of the physical acts and not what's going on in their heads and hearts. This can turn a great sensual scene into gratuitous (and boring) porn.

So what are some ways to make sure your love scene gets readers' hearts racing?

 

Make sure you've sufficiently built up tension.

See yesterday's post.

Write in emotions.

Tell us what's running through your character's mind. Often the emotions in this type of scene will be mixed.

Love scenes should be tailor-made

You should not be able to cut and paste it and drop into a different story. Only these two characters could have this exact scene.

Conflict should still be present.

If both love each other, have no obstacles, and jump in bed--yawn. They have to be risking something. Otherwise, it's just two people doing it.

Use dialogue.

I love using dialogue in a love scene. Teasing words can be great for tension. Dirty talk can be fun because often it's pushing the other character out of their comfort zone.

A sense of humor can come in handy

Love scenes don't have to be totally serious. Kissing someone or getting naked with someone can be awkward and a little humor and sarcasm can help ease nerves and bring the characters closer together. I find playful sarcasm sneaking into most of my love scenes because I write snarky characters.

Write what you feel comfortable with and what is right for the characters.

Love scenes don't have to be fully described (although they can be). You can shut the door and fade to black. It can be a simple kiss. You have to be comfy with the amount you're letting your reader see. And make sure it's appropriate for your character. If you're character is a virgin, don't write a scene where she acts like a pro.

Don't fear naughty. If your story calls for a little or a lot of dirty, and you feel comfortable writing that type of scene go for it.

If your hero is a notorious badass and playboy, he's probably going to be a little raunchier in bed. And raunchy doesn't have to mean it's porn. If you put in emotion and have built appropriate tension, even a threesome with all the four letter words used can be engaging and romantic. (I've seen it done.)

Remember the POV you're writing in.

If you are in the hero's point of view, remember that guys are going to think in a different way than the woman. He's probably not having flowery thoughts (maybe love thoughts, but not flowery). And he's hopefully not going to refer to his uh, friend, as his love sword in his head, lol.

Speaking of love swords...

Don't use cheesy euphemisms and purple prose. You don't have to use the clinical or crude terms (although you can depending on what you're writing), but use ones that don't make your readers laugh or roll their eyes.

Make sure it's the right time.

Don't put in a love scene just cause you think you need one. Motivate it properly. And it MUST move the plot forward and change the people involved in some way. Every scene has to have that purpose.

Sources: Writing Erotic Romance and Fiction Factor. Another great source (for the 18 and up crowd) author Stacia Kane's Sex Writing Strumpet series of blogs.

And last bit of advice: if your heart isn't racing while you write the scene, you're doing something wrong. You should be anticipating that scene as much as you want your reader to. The first love scene I wrote for my romance, I was sweating by the end of it, lol.

So do you have any tips on writing these scenes? Do you find them difficult to write? (For me they are hard, but so much fun at the same time.) What's one of your favorite love scenes from a book/movie/tv show?

**Today's Theme Song**

"Lay Your Hands on Me" - Bon Jovi

(player in sidebar, go ahead and take a listen)

Amping Up Sexual Tension

Today's topic...sexual tension and love scenes. I get the sense that most of you are writing YA and so you may think this isn't going to apply to you. However, some of my favorite YA books are chock full of sexual tension even though actual sex does not occur.

The Mortal Instruments series by Cassandra Clare is a good example. The tension between Jace and Clary is palpable. Sexual tension is also a huge part of the appeal of Twilight. Each are so aware of each other, but a mere touch or kiss could cause Edward to lose control. And of course, in tv shows, this is the workhorse. Dawson's Creek (pic above) held me for all seven (?) seasons with their use of sexual tension. Oh how I love Joey and Pacey, but I digress.

So how do we create this tension? Then once the tension is built, how do we work in a love scene that makes all that tension worth it?

To build tension:

Make the attraction that each feels for the other obvious to the reader.

--The characters are hyper aware of all the little details of the person when he/she is around. Use all the senses not just sight.

No conflict=no tension

--Make sure there are good reasons why these two can't be together--internal and external. Bella and Edward can't get together because, well, he may kill her.

Use internal dialogue

--The hero may be clenching his hands at his sides, but tell us why. The urge to reach out and touch the heroine's hair is overwhelming him.

Always on each other's mind

--If your hero and heroine aren't together in a scene, then have their thoughts go to the other so that we know he/she can't get the other off his/her mind.

Patience, grasshopper

--Don't relieve the tension too quickly. Frustration must build and build. There's a reason why the first love scene doesn't usually happen until 2/3 the way through a book.

Here we go, wait, not so fast

--Give you characters a taste of what they could have, then make them stop. This is the famous device on sitcoms where they start to kiss, but then someone burst in to interrupt. It doesn't have to be that obvious. One of the characters could be the one to stop (usually for some internal reason related to the conflict between them.)

It's addictive

--Once you do let the two get together the first time (be that a kiss or full out lovin'), leave them wanting more. Instead of satisfying their need/curiosity/etc., they want each other even more. Now they know what they could have if not for all that pesky conflict. Damn those mean authors who put so much in their way.

When all looks like it's going to work out, pull them apart again.

--Romantic comedy movies do this all the time. The characters seem to resolve some conflict and get together. Oh but wait, there's more! Some conflict wedges between them again.

--Don't resolve the relationship until very near the end. Otherwise, the reader will lose interest.

Source: Writing a Romance Novel for Dummies

Okay, since this is going a little long, I'll save my info on writing love scenes for another post.

So how about you? Does your novel have a romance or undercurrent of one? What author do you read that is a master at creating sexual tension? (I love Charlaine Harris for this. I wait with bated breath for my Eric and Sookie scenes.)

 

**Today's Theme Song**

"Want You Bad" - The Offspring

(player in sidebar, go ahead and take a listen)

Step One: Write a Great Story

I spend a lot of time on here talking about the different things we should look out for in our manuscripts. However, you can have a novel free of adverbs, participial phrases, wordiness, melodrama, and dialogue tags but still fall flat. Why? Because if you haven't written great characters and an interesting story, then all you have is a big stack of nicely edited words.

People often point out all the bestsellers out there that break the simple rules. "Look at all those -ly words! Oh my gosh, dialogue tags all over the place! That plot point would never happen." But what about story? Did their story capture you? Did the characters pull you in? Did the voice reach out and grab you?

Let's take my new favorite show Glee as an example. (Btw, if you're not watching this show, you are so missing out.) Now, I understand that Glee is a satire and many things are done tongue and cheek, but I'm going to look at a few points.

Stereotypical characters:

Mean blonde cheerleader

 

Bullying football player

 

Flamboyant gay guy

 

Outcast heroine

 

Unbelievable plot lines:

• Wife fakes pregnancy and husband doesn't know (i.e. never sees her naked or touches her stomach, doctor plays along with ruse)
• The football players are willing to do the Beyonce "Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)" dance on the field in order to win the game (hilarious, btw).

 

• They allow a thirty something year old woman to come back to HS and join Glee

 

• The counselor agrees to marry the coach but only if they live in separate houses and don't tell anyone.
• The pregnant high schooler finds out the sex of her baby at a 10 week sonogram (my doctor must have been a hack because I couldn't find out until 20 weeks when I was preggers.)
• I would say the Cheerleading coach is beyond belief, but I actually worked with someone who was frighteningly similar, even looked like her. Seriously.

 

So, on the surface, you would look at this and think the show is terrible. But it's not. The characters are lovable, the humor is spot on, and you really care about what happens. And that's what matters most.

So when you get stressed out over the mechanics and nuts and bolts of writing, remember that you are trying to write a great story. Worry about the details after that goal is accomplished.

Can you think of any other examples (books/movies/tv shows) that break the rules but still work? Do you find yourself getting tangled in the mechanics and losing site of your story?

**Today's Theme Song**

"Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)" - Beyonce

(player in sidebar--go ahead, take a listen)

The Non-Joiner Joins: Writer Groups

No one has every accused me of being loud and obnoxious. On the Myers-Briggs personality scale, I'm so solidly introverted it's not funny. Sure, I can push past my nature when necessary--I seem to pick careers (social work and human resources) that require a high amount of extroverted behavior and have done well at them. However, I have to work hard at being outgoing in those situations. If left to my own devices, I prefer to play the role of observer in large social gatherings. Now, with people I know, it's different--then I never shut up. But when I'm surrounded by strangers, I play my cards close to my vest.

So with my shy girl status, I have tended in the past to not be a "joiner". Clubs in high school and social organizations/sororities in college were just not my thing. I stuck with my small group of friends and was happy with that. But now that I've entered the writing world, I've found myself faced again with the decision to join or not to join.

I am lucky enough to live in Dallas, which has a very healthy community of writers. There are groups abound, chock full of both published and unpublished authors. Up until now, I haven't taken advantage of these resources. I had a twofold fear:

(1) my general anxiety of walking into a group of strangers who have already established friendships with each other and

(2) going somewhere and calling myself a writer (especially when there are legitimate published authors in the room).

But when I saw the workshops and opportunities that were being offered, I decided I needed to kick my own butt and get over myself. So I joined my local RWA chapter--the North Texas Romance Writers of America--and this weekend I attended my first meeting.

And I am so glad I did. Yes, I was nervous and a bit intimidated walking in, but everyone was super nice and made me feel very welcome. No one asked if I was published or not, just "What do you write?" And the speaker was member Shelley Bradley, who writes under the pen name Shayla Black. (Ironically, she's the author of those erotic romances I reviewed a few weeks ago. I had no idea she was a local author, lol.) She spoke about the ins and out of book contracts and the publishing process. So helpful. I'll make sure and get my notes together and share some of what I learned on here soon.

So, the verdict's in. If I get out of my own way, there is a great supportive community out there just waiting to embrace fellow writers. I had learned this was the case online, but now I know that it applies to in person groups as well.

Writing is a lonely process and trying to get published is a hard road. Who better to understand than people who are doing the same thing as you are? Put yourself out there. As I discovered first hand, they don't bite.

So what about you guys? Am I the only shy one out there? Do you have in person writing groups? Are you a member of your local genre-related chapter? Do you have trouble calling yourself a writer to others?

**Today's Theme Song**

"I Alone" - Live

(player in sidebar--go ahead, take a listen)

Face Off Friday: Free Expression or TMI?

Susan at A Walk in My Shoes posted last week on knowing the purpose of your blog. Some blogs have a defined niche, some are a mishmash of topics, and others are web style diaries. For me, I stick to writing/book related topics with the occasional personal post because, really, my life ain't that interesting. :) But obviously, the beauty of having your own blog is that it's yours and can be whatever you want it to be. And I love reading the variety that is out there.

However, when you're trying to get published, should you consider what agents might think if they click over to your site? There are some obvious things like the book review issue I already discussed, listing your rejections which Susan covered, or bad mouthing the publishing process. But I'm thinking more about the personal information issue. Is it okay to post things that, say, you wouldn't want your employer to know? Because ultimately an agent or publisher relationship will be a professional one. And if we are lucky enough to be published one day, is this information we would want our readers to know about us?

"Well I can delete those posts," you say. Ah, but the internet has a long memory called Cached Copy. Hop over here to see an example of how you can't really take something back.

Of course, the flip side of this argument is that a blog is a place for personal expression, so should be open to whatever. And if an agent doesn't like what's in your blog, then maybe they aren't the agent for you.

 

So what are your thoughts? Where do you draw the line on your blog or is there a line at all?

Also, I would like to thank Bob and Bess over at PlainOldBob Answers for this awesome award. I love the name. :) Make sure you go check out their site and say howdy.

**Today's Theme Song**

"My Wena" - Bowling For Soup (I ♥ this band)

*this song is TMI about his dachshund, um yeah*

(player in sidebar--go ahead, take a listen for a laugh)

What Kind of First Chapter Writer are You?

Chapter One. Two seemingly innocuous words. But they strike bone-chilling fear in most writers. If these first few pages fail to hook the agent/editor, your chance at getting published can fizzle in the few seconds it takes them to hit the eject button. No pressure, right?

So most of us know what a first chapter needs in theory. Starting in medias res, right in the middle off things. Hook the reader, draw them in, instantly. So why is it so hard to accomplish? According to these Harlequin editors, writers often fall into one of these first chapter categories.

Photo by Kazi Harok Al-Arafat (click pic for link)

 

The Free Spirit

This writer doesn't outline or plan, so she's not sure where her story is going, who her characters really are, or what the plot points will be. So this ends up in a meandering, unfocused first chapter.

Solution: Make sure that you revamp that first chapter dramatically after the whole story is together so that the threads are started clearly.

 

The Procrastinator

This writer writes her way into the story. Chapter one turns into a sea of backstory and description to set up the story instead of actually starting the story.

Solution: Often it is hard to start a story without writing out the backstory for yourself. Do this as a writing exercise, not as the first chapter. Then take the elements of that backstory and sprinkle them in throughout the story.

 

No-Man (or Woman's)-Land

This is related to the procrastinator. The writer spends too much time on other things and doesn't introduce the main characters until Chapter two. This is more important in some genres than others. In romance, hero and heroine should both make an appearance quickly. IMO, YA should also start with the MC. In suspense or thriller, you may have an opening incident from the killer's perspective or something so there are exceptions.

Solution: Your story is ultimately about your characters, so make sure we meet the main ones quickly. Endless description, world-building, etc. in chapter one will lose a lot of people.

 

Saves the Best for Last

This writer thinks that readers will hang on until chapter four or five for the main conflict/action to get going.

Solution: Start your story where it "gets good". If you find yourself saying to your beta-readers, oh just wait until you get to here... you may want to cut those first few chapters.

 

Me-Me-Me

This writer is the storyteller so sets about telling us everything from the author's perspective instead of letting the characters talk for themselves. This separates the readers from the story.

Solution: Let the characters show the reader what's going on.

 

The Party Animal

This writer loves characters, lots of them, so there's a party of minor players and a swarm of names bombarding the reader in chapter one. Who's the MC? How can we tell?

Solution: Minor characters and subplots are great, but keep it to a minimum in the first chapter. The reader has to be able to identify the MCs.

 

The Show-Stopper

This writer knows how to write a killer opening line and scene. But after that, goes down in a blaze of glory. Think of these as that great movie preview that makes you desperate to see a film, then after you spend your 8 bucks, you realize the preview was the only good part of the movie.

Solution: Treat every chapter like the first chapter. You can lose a reader at any time. So make sure every scene is interesting, moves the plot forward, and keeps the reader wanting more.

I'm hoping that in my recent WIP, I haven't fallen into these categories. With the short length of category romance, you don't have a choice but to jump in and get thing rolling quickly. But I know with my first WIP, I definitely suffered from a combination of the Procrastinator and Saving the Best for Last.

Have you found yourself in one of these camps before? Which one do you gravitate toward if not paying attention?

Alright, now a few links:

• Angie over at Gumbo Writer is re-launching the Rose and Thorn Journal today, which is "a quarterly literary journal featuring the voices of emerging and established authors, poets and artists." They have a free newsletter, so hop on over and check them out.

• Editor to Rent created a list of Marks of an Amateur that they see in submissions. Really helpful.

• And, I wanted to mention for those of you who are new to this blog that I am now marking all writing craft entries with the "writer toolbox" label. So if you want a quick link to all crafty things, click on writer toolbox in the labels box in the right sidebar. Or click here.

• And lastly, I now have a retweet button at the bottom of each entry, so if you find an article helpful, I'd love for your to tweet me. Wait, that sounds dirty. Well, you know what I mean.

UPDATE: Just ran across this article today on what TO DO in the first chapter over at The Kill Zone. Check it out. Great stuff

Alright, that's it. Make sure you let me know what type of first chapter writer you are. :)

**Today's Theme Song**

"Kickstart My Heart" - Motley Crue

(player in sidebar--go ahead, take a listen)

Wordiness: The Post in Which I Discuss Reduction of the Aforementioned

I'm a wordy girl. In school, the teachers used to tell us the minimum amount of pages required for a paper. While others were trying to figure out what font would fill the maximum amount of space (Courier New, btw), I would be trying to get my paper under fifteen pages. So I know I have to watch this tendency when I'm writing.

The terrific resources on the RWA site helped me out again. Here are some things to help cut the fluff out of your manuscript.

1. Eliminate and remove redundancy.

Fluffy: She sobbed and tears fell from her eyes as she watched him walk away.

Sleek: Tears fell from her eyes as he walked away.

2. Delete intensifiers that don't intensify.

F: Generally, Mary kept her very deepest emotions hidden.

S: Mary kept her deepest emotions hidden.

(or even better: Mary hid her deepest emotions.)

3. Remove important sounding phrases that don't add to a sentence.

F: All things considered, she was thankful for the outcome.

S: She was thankful for the outcome.

4. Avoid starting sentences with expletives.

No, this doesn't mean curse words. An expletive according to Webster is : "a syllable, word, or phrase inserted to fill a vacancy without adding to the sense." That should tell us all we need to know. (it was, there are, etc)

F: It was his eyes that made her heart beat faster.

S: His eyes made her heart beat faster.

(Or better: His eyes made her heart pound.)

 

5. Use active instead of passive voice whenever you can.

F: The dishes were washed after dinner by my mother.

S: After dinner, my mother washed the dishes.

6. Reduce clauses to phrases, and reduce phrases to single words.

F: In the very near future, she would have to make a decision.

S: Soon, she would have to decide.

 

7. Remove adjective clauses where you can.

 

F: The girl who lived next door wore a dress that had pink stripes.

S: The girl next door wore a pink striped dress.

 

8. Turn prepositional phrases into one-word modifiers.

F: The captain of the football team always dated the prettiest of the cheerleaders.

S: The football team captain always dated the prettiest cheerleader.

 

9. Cut extraneous words or phrases.

F: We conducted an investigation regarding the murder.

S: We investigated the murder.

 

10. Remove cliches and euphemisms.

F: He had a sneaking suspicion his protests were falling on deaf ears.

S: He suspected they were ignoring his protests.

 

11. Weed out the "to be".

F: Sue found the children to be exhausting.

S: Sue found the children exhausting.

 

12. Avoid stating the obvious.

F: He sat down and realized it was already 6am in the morning.

S: He sat and realized it was already 6am.

 

*This a personal favorite of mine. I naturally write "stood up"--like where else can you stand but up? Grr. I do it all the time.

13. Delete meaningless adverbs.

F: She yelled at him loudly, then ran away quickly.

S: She yelled at him and ran.

 

The source that I pulled this from also has fantastic lists of

Redundant Phrases like

absolutely essential = essential

future plans = plans

Wordy Phrases

A lot of = many

Come to an end = end

And Cliches

sad but true

give a damn

So are any of you wordy like me? Which of these do you find cropping up in your manuscript the most?

And in honor of the amazing U2 concert I attended last night, a song that has a single word title but says so much...

**Today's Theme Song**

"One" - U2

(player in sidebar--go ahead, take a listen)

Perfectionism is Slow Death

Photo by Cindy See

This picture made me laugh because there is actually a guy down my street who sits in his grass and trims it with a hand tool and picks through it like he's a momma monkey plucking fleas off her young. And his lawn does look great, but honestly, it doesn't look all that different from my yard, which just gets cut the regular old way.

So this got me to thinking about perfectionism when writing. When do we know it's time to stop editing and revising? How can we tell when detail orientation has turned into obsessive perfectionism?

I have trouble finding this line. I'm a perfectionist by nature. Case in point: You do not want to know how much time I spent revamping the format of this blog over last few days. If something was a half inch too far to the right or whatever, it drove me crazy until I could figure out how to fix it. And these obsessive tendencies definitely bleed into my writing. Every time I read through my manuscript, I can find something to change. On good days, this may be a word that needs to be changed or punctuation that needs to be fixed. On bad days, this could be a whole plot thread I want to rewrite.

And of course, editing, revising and a detailed eye are vital for creating a great manuscript, but seeking perfection is a losing battle. It won't be perfect. Ever. So how do we know when we've reached this point...

So you tell me, how do you know when to stop? What's your litmus test for knowing the manuscript is ready to send out to the world?

Also, as a bonus today, some laughs for a gray Monday and helpful links:

• Smart Bitches, Trashy Books (who you should check out if you're not familiar--they're hilarious) held a contest for renaming this terrible romance book cover. Make sure you read the comments--I was rolling.

• Cracked.com did their own snarky synopsizing of the four Twilight books. This is a must read. Here's a taste:

Three hundred pages after "Oh, you like me too? No way, I thought you hated me!", the plot arrives late to the party, drunk, in a beat-up '53 Chevy pick-up truck. It drives away about fifty pages later and crashes into a tree, gets sent to the hospital, and is rarely heard from again throughout the course of the series.

• Kidlit.com (agent Mary Kole's website) is holding a query contest for YA/MG/picture books. If you win, she will crit the first thirty pages of of your manuscript. How awesome is that?

• Over at Miss Snark's First Victim, she's holding another Secret Agent contest. You post your first 250 words and a mystery agent comments (along with readers). Then the agent picks a winner and typically requests a partial. (She gets biggie agents to do this, so a great opportunity.) This month it's only open to Adult books (no YA) of any genre except SF/F or erotica. Contest opens at noon today.

Hope everyone has a great day!

**Today's Theme Song**

"Perfect" - Simple Plan

(player in sidebar--go ahead, take a listen)

*title is quote by Hugh Prather*